Teachers Log On To Mrs. Lind-Sherman

THANK YOU, WHITNEY - YOUR LIFE MATTERED

2012-02-12T22:32:00.000-08:00

"I think music in itself is healing. It's an explosive expression of humanity. It's something we are all touched by. No matter what culture we're from, everyone loves music." by Billy Joel

I'm watching the Grammy awards, like many of you probably are. Because of the untimely and unexpected death of Whitney Houston a quick program change was made to honor this amazing singer's life.

Obviously tormented by personal problems and substance abuse, she probably had no idea how her life and death would affect millions around the world. If she could have known would it have made a difference?

I think there is a lesson here for all of us, no matter how inconsequential we think we are. Each of us matter, whether to few or many, and we need to make as many minutes count as possible.

Here are some of Whitney's contributions in poem form:

M. . . Moved us to tears

U. . . Unified the world

S. . . Seven consecutive number one singles

I. . . " I will always love you" will endure forever

C. . . Contemporary pop star often copied by others

Whitney, we will miss your incredible voice, and hope that your music continues to bring pleasure to others wherever you are.

CIVILITY+COMPASSION+COMMUNITY=GOOD CITIZENSHIP

2012-02-05T12:01:00.000-08:00

I was in quaint downtown Edmonds the other day, and saw a sight to gladden my eyes. A little girl was walking with a grabber in one hand and a plastic bag in the other. She was accompanied by an elderly woman I assume was her grandmother. The bag was full of trash and it appeared that a good example of civic/community service was taking place.

What an effective way to teach community involvement, I thought to myself. It struck me that this simple activity put new meaning to the word "grassroots." The grandma was teaching a fundamental lesson of caring about one'scommunity. It would not surprise me if the child was learning other important lessons at home - like how to be civil to others, how to show compassion, and what it mean to be a good citizen.

How does our country's general population stack up in these four"Cs" ? Not well, if what we see on television is any measure. The rude, lewd behavior our children witness daily, the brutality of bullying at school, dissension and child abuse at home, and the out and out lies, distortion of the facts, or spin as it is now called, by our nation's leaders and media are appalling lessons that undermine our country and our world.

Although "Respect others" is posted on every classroom wall, and teachers fight the "respect battle" daily, children are often subjected to bad behavior everywhere in their lives. We decry the lack of civility in others yet important and visible adults are verbally bashing each other at home, in sporting events, in the media and even in cartoons.

Recently, those involved in this election cycle have been guilty of name calling, spinning the truth, self interest, and flagrant disrespect of their opponents . If you, like me, agonize about these issues, what can you do? I think one answer is to make a difference in one's own world. We throw our pebbles of compassion, civility and community service into the pool of caring, and teach our children to do the same. Then we hope that the ripple effect will bring about a positive change for everyone.

Here are ten effective pebbles to teach children how to be compassionate, caring, civil community members and citizens:

1. Use the example above and take your child on a "clean up" stroll through your own community.

2. Find articles in the newspaper or online about what is going on in our country and the world, and selectively share them for discussion. Example: Today, in the N.Y. Times there was an article about how protesting a soccer match caused a riot in Egypt. Talking about why riots happen, and how they can be avoided could be useful.

2. If you give your children an allowance, show involvement by having them give 10% to a charitable cause. Let them choose the cause after you discuss possible options.

3. Teach respect for the elderly by bringing cookies or pretty cards to a nursing or assisted living facility. Valentine's Day is a great time to show some love.

4. Help someone in need. Have your children set up a lemonade stand or plan some other fundraiser with the proceeds going to a needy person/family in your community. We had a real life example a few years back when a local boy was hospitalized with a rare disease requiring a long stay in the hospital and many costly plastic surgeries. The children in three local families put on a small carnival at the same time as a fishing derby for kids in the area. Over $300.00 was raised and it was all given to the boy's family. The children putting on the carnival gained skills in planning, promoting and executing a worthwhile event.

5. Have your children go through their toys and give those they no longer need or want to a charitable organization or church bazaar.

6. If your children are involved in after-school sports, where emotions often run high, insist on good sportsmanship in your child. Be courageous enough to call on others, even the coach, to do the same. On the other hand, in these same after-school sports, if you have coaches who are giving of their time and talent to young people, make sure your children and you show respect to them, especially if he team is not doing well.

7. Pick a family in need at a holiday like Thanksgiving, and provide them with a great dinner. The community college where my son teaches has a Thanksgiving outreach program aimed at impoverished families. Entire meals, with all the trimmings, are prepared at the college and delivered by faculty members. My son and his children have delivered these holiday meals to two families or more families since the girls were old enough to walk and talk. What a great lesson in sharing and compassion.

8. If your city is planning something oriented to children, like a park or playground, consider taking your child to a council meeting to give input or writing a letter to give ideas for the planned project.

9. Since the world is shrinking and we are becoming interdependent, gaining understanding of and respect for other cultures is a key to harmony. One old tried but true method is finding a pen pal. With the internet making communication easy and instant, monitoring the correspondence with a student in another country can teach a lot about how others live.

10. Teaching your children the importance of honesty,integrity and respect for others is one of the most important pebbles for the pool of caring.

Really, the "golden rule" says it all. Do unto others as you would have others do unto you. How can it be said better, and wouldn't the world be a better place if we followed that one rule? It covers compassion, civility, the people in the community, and our country's and world's citizens. Start casting your pebbles today to make a difference.

BOOK NOOK

Teachers and homeschooling parents can learn more about teaching civics and citizenship by checking out these sites:

1. http://www.icivics.org/

2. http://ideas.time.com/2011/12/06/can-we-teach-kids-to-be-good-citizens/

3. http://www.kellybear.com/TeacherArticles/TeacherTip27.html

A SHORT SALE'S VERY LONG STORY

2012-01-29T22:28:00.000-08:00

Foreclosure, bankruptcy, and short sales are words that have become all too common in today’s real estate market. They embody the good, the bad and the ugly for many home owners. We all know people who bought homes at high prices and who are now underwater on their mortgages, just struggling to hold on. We also know folks who have simply walked away from their dream homes, forced to start over, and with bad credit for years to come.

For a lucky few the short sale is the doorway to homeownership. My daughter, Jonelle, is one of those. In September she decided to give up apartment living in favor of a home big enough to expand her Etsy business and display her photography and other artistic endeavors. We were all excited at the prospect, but were naïve about the process, learning many lessons along the way. Here are some of those lessons in case you want to embark on a similar adventure.

Her story went something like this. She found a wonderful pair of agents, Kathy Bowman and Cheryl Stewart, from Lake Real Estate in Green Lake,who seemed to know the market, and had a good understanding of distressed homes. Although, Jonelle, would love to live in the Ballard, Fremont or Green Lake areas, her job was in Edmonds, and the homes were more affordable going north. She decided to concentrate on Edmonds, Shoreline, Lynnwood and Mountlake Terrace. For the next four months she saw scores of homes that were bank owned or available for short sale, and soon learned the difference.

Almost ready to give up, on a dark, rainy night she found a home that she thought would work for her, a 4-bedroom rambler in Mountlake Terrace. It looked like a good deal and besides, weren’t short sales wonderful bargains?! She and her agent put an offer on it and waited. No guarantee she would hear anything soon. And like the proverbial saying, “when it rains, it pours” she found a second house she liked even better in Edmonds which was open for bids at an upcoming auction. Still hearing nothing from the first house, she bid on the second, and continued the waiting game. She was finally notified on the first one that there was a competing offer, so she offered full price plus closing costs. And waited. The auction for the second house came and went, and she learned that her offer was not accepted, but she was second in line. Back to the first house, while waiting we did some searching and found that there was only one lien on the property – that of the lending bank. A notice came through asking if my daughter planned to rent out the home, to which she replied in the negative. It seemed like there was some movement. More waiting. People who had their own short sale stories said it could take up to a year, and still not work. She noticed that short sale homes went pending, only to appear again later as people grew tired of waiting for a response. The “not knowing” was nerve wracking.

Finally the news came that she could have the house if she wanted it. But, she needed an inspection to the tune of several hundred dollars. She also realized the property was on a septic, not sewer system which was a surprise because she assumed sewer systems were routine in urban areas.We encouraged her to get a septic tank inspection to make sure it was in good order. Several hundred more dollars later she found out the septic tank was just fine, but a can of worms was now opened. The city informed all parties that a new owner would have to pay a $4,000 + back assessment because it was supposed to have been hooked up to the city sewer several years ago. Nowhere was such an amount listed, and it certainly wasn’t listed as a lien on the property. Aaarghh! Not only that, the old septic system would have to be decommissioned and the new sewer line connected, to the tune of several thousand dollars more.

At this point she had a decision to make. She could get out of the sale because of this new development. The inspection showed a number of flaws in the house, and any potential repairs raised the amount she would be investing. But it was still a “good buy”, right? The words “as is” are part of every sale of this kind. There seemed to be no recourse to get out of installing the sewer system, unfair as it was. The failure to disclose on the sewer assessment was galling, but the city seemed to hold the cards in the matter, as the bank would not approve the sale unless the work was done.So, long story short, she decided to go for it, and see if there was some way to recoup the loss through small claims against whichever entity was responsible.

One last insult to injury had to do with the furnace. The owner said that it would go on and off and he didn’t know why. So Jonelle had a gas furnace specialist come out and inspect/fix the furnace. To her horror she was told that the furnace had not been serviced in years, and that the filters hadn’t been changed regularly, resulting in a burned out motor and a cost of $l,000 for a new one.

So now she is a bona fide homeowner with all the perks and problems that are involved. Along with the pride of ownership comes unexpected and additional costs not found in apartments – utilities, repairs, yard expenses, and the like. She said it felt like a bottomless money pit. “Yup, that’s what having a home is all about!” said I, a seasoned owner of a house, a cabin, a rental home, and two prior rentals that lost money because of the recent recession.

I think, though, that she will do just fine. She has dealt with every obstacle with inside trepidation and and an outside calm demeanor. She got a good enough deal, even with all the financial angst, that she will probably do well even if the future economic picture looks bleak.

If you are thinking of pursuing a path like hers, here are some things to think about.

1. Read up on short sales and bank foreclosure comparisons. There are many good sites, but an excellent one put out by Twin Cities Real Estate has a one page comparison of traditional short sale and foreclosed/bank owned properties.

2. Find an agent who will take as much time with you as Jonelle’s agent, Kathy, did. They went out night after night and many weekends for months on end. Bless you, Kathy. Both Kathy and Cheryl advised Jonelle and held her hand throughout.

3. Get pre-approved. Jonelle went with Sterling Savings Bank and her loan officer was Barb Huber-Read. Barb is kind, helpful and went the “extra mile” in spite of the crunch at the end caused in part by unexpected and heavy snow and a Fed Ex truck that was late because of icy road conditions.

4. On short sales determine if there is more than one primary lien holder. This can slow down the process.

5. If you are lucky enough to live in Seattle you can go to Seattle Short Sales for possible assistance.

6. If you need help with a sewer/septic system, we were truly fortunate to find Dustan Bunt, owner of Above Grade Septic. He responded quickly with a bid, was amazingly adept at what he does, and was able to handle a difficult problem concerning the depth of the sewer hook-up. I can’t say enough good things about him.

Finally, make sure you have a sense of humor and a healthy dose of patience. Finding someone who can do the leg work and field calls while you are stuck at your office desk is necessary. Also, have a big group of friends who have generally helpful natures. Lure them over with a promise of beer/wine and pizza. By this time it’s probably all you can afford. Good luck and God bless!

THE IMPORTANCE OF MEMOIRS - FROM MARTIN TO LOUISE TO ME TO YOU

2012-01-22T20:20:00.000-08:00

"Memoirs are the backstairs of history." George Meredith

Last week I wrote about Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. and how his existence made a difference in my life, both personally and professionally. I also mentioned the many people of color who have enriched, challenged and mentored me. One of those mentors was Louise McKinney, an amazing woman I first met when she was a principal at Sacajawea Elementary School and I was assigned to that school as a beginning teacher. Her belief in me and the example she set as an academic leader was the foundation on which I built my own success in the classroom, and the inspiration to be all that I could be.

Our paths touched throughout the years, even as she rose to be the Director of the Office of Academic Achievement in Seattle Public Schools, and I went from Sacajawea, Alki and finally to Martin Luther King Elementary School (MLK) where I stayed for l8 years.

It was logical then, that when financial good fortune allowed my husband and I to found the Martin Luther King School Dream Foundation, Louise would become a board member. Our mission was to give scholarships to former students of MLK and we have been doing that since 1999. Since then she has retired, I have retired and the school has closed, but her belief in me and my appreciation of her have not wavered.

In addition to her academic endeavors, she was also the wife of Rev. Samuel McKinney, retired pastor of Seattle’s Mount Zion Baptist Church. I have long known about their importance and influence in the Seattle community, and that they knew Martin Luther King, Jr. and his wife, Coretta, personally. It was only in a recent conversation with Louise that I learned the extent of their friendship with the Kings, and just how big a role they played in helping bring racial equality to our country. We have in them a local treasure trove of historical stories and insights.

How Martin and Samuel met, became friends, and later classmates at Morehouse College, and how they and others like them changed the face of America with planned peaceful demonstrations is another story, among many already written, that needs to be told. It was fascinating to hear firsthand how Martin went from being a shy, quiet child, to the dynamic inspirational speaker we all knew. Somehow hearing Louise talk about those early years of the peace movement, as one who had been there and participated, makes Dr. King and that time period more real. Here is another anecdote she shared that touched my heart and made this god-like man seem so real.

In November of 1961, Martin came to speak in Seattle at the Eagle’s Auditorium, now ACT. At that time Louise was a young mother of a six year old and a 2 month old. She desperately wanted to hear the speech, but the baby was colicky and would not stop crying. When Martin arrived at their home and saw the crying baby, he picked her up, comforted her, and within short order the baby was sleeping in his arms. He insisted that the distressed mother find a babysitter so that she could attend the performance along with her husband.

What a story! In my recent conversation with Louise I urged her to write her memoir, and that her husband do the same. It is so important to hear what really happened from those who were present, rather than reading a biography that might be incomplete and carry some mistruths.

Sadly I was not able to take my own advice. I had planned to write a family memoir called “Point of View” which would have shown how birth order over a twenty year span of time affects family dynamics. I was second youngest of seven children whose lives spanned the period before the Great Depression until the present day with all its technological advances. My procrastination meant that two sisters passed away before I could accomplish my task. If I ever do manage to write my family’s story, it will certainly not be as accurate as it could have been.

If you are reading this article, then you are showing an interest in people and events. You too have memories that need to be documented in order to recognize your place in history and what it might mean for those in your family who come after you. Here is an example. My husband’s grandfather left a small daily journal among his belongings, and many entries were simply the day to day events of his life at the time. Simple as it was, it was fascinating to read about his going to town in a horse drawn wagon, buying supplies, returning to do farm chores and the like.

I guess what I am saying is that your history doesn’t have to be as dramatic as that of Louise McKinney. It will still be of interest to your children, grandchildren, nieces and nephews. So don’t delay. Start tonight and write a few sentences about your day. Future generations will thank you.

MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR. WHAT A MAN!

2012-01-15T23:14:00.000-08:00

Human progress is neither automatic nor inevitable... Every step toward the goal of justice requires sacrifice, suffering, and struggle; the tireless exertions and passionate concern of dedicated individuals. by Martin Luther King, Jr.

Nearly twenty-five years ago I started teaching at Martin Luther King Elementary School in Seattle. I knew a little about the man for whom the school was named, but was ignorant about black history, black culture and black people in general. The ensuing eighteen years brought about enlightenment on all fronts. After many classroom experiences with predominantly minority children, interactions with black parents and workshops dealing with racism I became an active anti-racist.

During those years I harangued my students into doing their best in school, being proud of themselves and reaching their potential. "Who knows," I would say, "one of you might be the first black president some day." Now, if I had my own classroom, I would have to qualify my words to say "One of you might be president someday" without the color adjective. We have come a long, long way, and I think most people would agree that Martin Luther King, Jr. played a major role.

Learning about him over the years, and preparing my students for the assembly honoring him each January, I gained a keen appreciation for his courage, conviction and message. His "I have a dream speech", delivered on August 28, 1963 during the march on Washington, sends chills through me to this day. Here is one of my favorite passages, which I hope will touch you, the reader, the way it touched me.

I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character. I have a dream today.

I have a dream that one day, down in Alabama, with its vicious racists, with its governor having his lips dripping with the words of interposition and nullification; one day right there in Alabama, little black boys and black girls will be able to join hands with little white boys and white girls as sisters and brothers. I have a dream today.

We have indeed come a long way since these words were spoken. We have racial equality on most fronts not seen in the sixties. We have black children being judged by the content of their character. We have little white boys and little white girls joining hands with little black boys and little black girls. We have the ultimate proof of acceptance, President Barak Obama, our nation's first African-American leader.

It's personal with me as I watch an amazing friendship grow between my granddaughter, Lily, and her African American friend Kiyah. The two thirteen-year-olds hang out at school, after school and on the basketball court. They have a fist bumping routine that must be seen to be believed, and it gets more complicated each time they do it. I would not be surprised if they remained close friends throughout their lives. Thank you, Dr. King. At least in this corner of the world, your dream was realized, and it has enriched us all.

Of course many say we still have a long way to go, that there is still bias and racism, but I take comfort in a story related to me by Lily's mom. She is a kindergarten teacher in Bellingham and told me how she teaches the concept of fairness, by connecting it to Martin Luther King, Jr. Prior to reading a story to her young charges last Friday, she set it up so that only the little blonde children could be sitting on the floor in front of her where they could hear and see well. All the children with black, brown or red hair had to sit at a back table. You can imagine the resulting hue and cry. From there she was able to have a discussion on their level, that opened their eyes to how unfair it was in the past that children of color were not treated fairly. Their sense of fairness versus unfairness was so entrenched her students could not comprehend how such behavior could have existed. Yes, we've come a long ways.

Doctor King’s birthday tomorrow will be a day of celebration all across the land. I urge you to watch his “I have a dream” speech via Youtube video. It will transport you back to a tumultuous time in our country’s past. If you haven't seen it before, or heard its life changing message, you will be awestruck by the scope of history you are observing. And perhaps like me, you will feel the thrill that comes from knowing that a man of vision took our country to another level of understanding, compassion, and justice.

MEXICAN STANDOFF IN A GUAYMAS WALMART

2012-01-01T16:32:00.000-08:00

It was my fault really. Armed with a 3 month Spanish language class from Edmonds Community College, I just wanted to take my knowledge to the next level - really communicating with native Spanish speakers. Well I flunked. Big time. My Spanish professor who had given me a well deserved “A” in the class would have been disgusted and disillusioned. I worried that maybe I had beginning Alzheimers. But enough, here’s the whole sad story.

My husband and I were taking a 25^th silver anniversary holiday in San Carlos, Mexico, and staying at the beautiful Sea of Cortez Beach Club. We found out online that the daytime temperatures were going to be in the mid 80s. Perfect! Night time temperatures didn’t register on our consciousness, but once there we realized that we were ill equipped to hang out in an unheated room with temperatures in the 40s. After two nights of cold that beat Seattle, I decided I needed something warmer than my romantic teddy in order to sleep.

Having seen a Walmart on the way from the airport, I thought, “Ah-hah, a great place to pick up some warm nightwear.” Telling my long-suffering man that I would only be a minute, I dashed into the store. It was huge, with few English words in sight. I finally spotted some long pants in what looked like the ladies’ sleepwear department, but I wasn’t sure that size CH would work. In fact I couldn’t figure out what it even meant. Three sales ladies visiting nearby were completely baffled by my question about sizes, and stared at me without comprehension. It was at that moment that an overwhelming need to use a bathroom struck and would not be denied. Switching questions I asked about a bathroom. I absolutely could NOT remember the word for toilet. I gestured, and said “toilet, toiletten, too-ah-let” but to no avail. Short of taking down my pants and squatting, it wasn’t going to work. Finally one gestured to follow and we headed to the back of the store which proved to be a very long walk. Once there she pointed to the back corner, smiling and nodding.

I smiled and nodded back. This made sense, I had been in stores like Home Depot or Lowes, where the bathrooms were in the rear corner, so headed quickly in that direction only to find a dead end. Turning in desperation I found another saleslady who was equally unskilled in English and I went through the same charade. She nodded, then went to a phone at the pharmacy counter. No luck. She didn’t understand what I wanted, and I was truly desperate. Because I can speak a little Swedish, a little French and a very little Russian I tried all the words that might work - toaletten, toilettes, and tualet – to no avail. Finally I asked for paper and pencil and drew a picture of a toilet. To this she simply shook her head vehemently and said “no, no, no” and with a few more gestures I finally realized she thought I wanted to BUY a toilet. I shook my head equally vehemently, and she finally seemed to get what was needed. Again nodding and smiling, she beckoned for me to follow her back to the very front of the store, pointing victoriously to a huge sign proclaiming something like los sanitarios, with the familiar man-woman symbols underneath. I had walked right by it, unseeing, on arrival, and then it hit me….bano! The words los banos had eluded me. A 5 minute shopping expedition had turned into a 25 minute misadventure with the uncomfortable realization that I had a very long way to go before I could claim any knowledge of the Spanish language.

I guess the moral of the story is to take a pocket size phrase book with you whenever you are visiting another country, and not to assume that people will understand your needs. For your information I have researched the word for toilet in every country to which you might travel. The variety of words are astounding. http://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/toilet.htm

The other lesson learned was that I had better get serious about making use of my Rosetta Stone CDs before I head south again. And I DO want to take another trip to visit our southern neighbors. What a friendly, helpful and delightful group of people! Perhaps, in a later blog, I will tell you more about the outdoor market and beautiful harbor in Guaymas, great tasting coffee and buns at Barracuda Bob's, the amazing view while having a drink at Charlie’s Rock, the anniversary dinner at Blackie’s, a truly authentic Mexican lunch at Rosa's Cantina, the funny music at Bananas, the pearl farm near the university, the nature cruise with Gary and Donna, birdwatching everywhere, especially dive bombing pelicans, the quaint little fishing village at the end of a dirt road, and the hotel’s outstanding restaurant-bar, pool and hot tub.

Though originally influenced by all the cautions listed on certain web sites, as well as those uttered by friends and family members, we felt perfectly safe in both Guaymas and San Carlos. We learned that tourism is down by over 70% in that area, and that this area which depends a lot on tourism is suffering economically. We met several people who had driven down from Phoenix and California, and we ourselves rented a car to do some exploring. So, put this part of Mexico in your travel plans. You definitely won’t be sorry.

MIRACLE AT THE MALL. YES, KACEY THERE REALLY IS A SANTA!

2011-12-25T00:45:00.000-08:00

Once again, we come to the Holiday Season, a deeply religious time that each of us observes, in his own way, by going to the mall of his choice. ~Author Unknown

Two of my granddaughters and their mom came from Bellingham to Edmonds for their annual holiday dress shopping spree last Tuesday. In the past we parked at Seattle Center, checked out the latest displays there, rode the monorail, walked the streets of Seattle, enjoyed a horse driven carriage ride, viewed the marvelous gingerbread houses at the Sheraton Hotel, and soaked up all the street activity – musicians, homeless panhandlers, store windows filled with animated displays, and the pulsating crowds of last minute shoppers and gawkers.

But this year, Lily was a 13-year old and the game plan was different. It was a “shop ‘til you drop” kind of day, and we started from Edmonds at noon, driving through stop and go freeway traffic, finally paying $l5.00 to park in a garage on Pike street. Thus we began a marathon of looking for a particular black dress to be worn to a friend’s December 31 Bat Mitzvah. The dress in question had been spotted on an internet site and was currently only available out of Canada according to our new teenager. Surely we would be able to find its counterpart in the big city of Seattle. Her sister, ten year old Kacey, was tagging unhappily along, visions of fish throwing at the market, another horse carriage ride, or an IMAX movie dancing in her head. The latter was not to be as we gamely went from one store to another in search of the perfect dress. By the time we had checked out American Eagle Outfitters, Express, Urban Outfitters, H & M, and Forever 21, to name only a few, it was 5:00 p.m. and we were hungry and discouraged. I suggested we head north to Alderwood Mall, meet their Auntie Nelle at Claim Jumper for some sustenance, and to continue our quest at Nordstrom and Macy’s. As we walked back to the car the girls were somewhat scandalized by the blatant pot smoker who stood near us as we waited to cross the street. We all “tsked, tsked,” and Kacey held her nose in disgust. It was probably a little more fascinating than the street scene in Bellingham.

We fought rush hour traffic heading north on I-5, but because we were eligible for the carpool lane, made the trip in record time. After regaining our strength at the restaurant we headed to Nordstrom but had no luck. Macy’s was next. They had a large selection, but none matched the envisioned dress. It must have a certain bodice, a twirly skirt and skinny shoulder straps. By this time, close to 8:00 p.m., like Rosa Parks, I just had to sit down. I told them they could find me at the outside Starbucks when they were finished shopping. During the 90-minute wait I had a skinny peppermint mocha and a very long phone conversation with my sister, Judy. I was considering a nap when suddenly they appeared, laughing hysterically, and filled with the need to tell about the “miracle” that had happened to them in one of the stores.

Apparently Kacey had spotted Santa and had taken off after him to tell him about her sister’s dilemma. One minute he was there and then he simply vanished. It seemed strange and impossible, and perhaps some kind of omen. In the meantime, Lily had found a dress that would have to do, and was standing in line to pay with her aunt, mother and Kacey, who was babbling about her Santa experience. They were telling the sales clerk their long, sad story, when suddenly she said a dress had just been returned and maybe they should look at it. Would you believe it was the VERY dress they had been looking for all along, in the exact right size, and here it was before their very eyes?

Of course they were full of this miracle, and Kacey just knew Santa had something to do with it. And who can argue?

Now the 2011 shopping trip to Seattle is just a memory. Lily will no doubt always remember her search for and finding the perfect dress, Kacey will always remember how much she hated all the shopping, the stinky pot smoker and Santa’s amazing disappearance, their mom made sure we would all remember everything, by taking many pictures to commemorate the miracle, and I will always remember the year that a little girl crossed over into young womanhood, when shopping became more important than anything else that downtown Seattle at Christmas had to offer.

I close by wishing you a very wonderful holiday, no matter how you celebrate, and a hope that you can look back on the year with a degree of peace and contentment. Here are some Christmas gift suggestions made by Oren Arnold: To your enemy, forgiveness. To an opponent, tolerance. To a friend, your heart. To a customer, service. To all, charity. To every child, a good example. To yourself, respect.

THE SECRET OF THE POWER PURSE

2011-12-11T00:44:00.000-08:00

A couple of days ago two professional women, each top in her field, came to our house for what could have been a difficult business meeting. They did not know each other or have full knowledge of the other's expertise. In working together one of them would have to change direction. My husband was uncomfortable. Although a trained diplomat, mediator, and facilitator he did not look forward to a possible confrontation between two high powered women. He misunderstood one very important thing - the power of the purse as ice breaker and relationship builder.

They arrived within minutes of each other. The last to arrive walked into the family room where coffee was available, and the women were introduced. Both still had their purses draped over their arms. Suddenly, eyes locked on each others' purses, they nearly swooned over the two bags, one plain black and the other a colorful fabric.

The ensuing conversation went something like this:

"Your bag is fabulous!"

"I got it at the Vera Bradley store in Bellevue."

"I love it!"

" Yours is amazing too!"

"Look at these pockets!"

"I know, aren't they wonderful, and look at this perfect place for my cell phone!"

The conversation continued unabated for several minutes. By this time they were enthusiastically checking out each other's bags, oohing and aahing over all the pockets, big and small, that held the accoutrements of a typical high powered business woman.

My husband stood by trying, without success, to suggest they all go into the living room to begin their meeting. The ladies weren't the least bit interested as they continued to extol the virtues of their particular handbags and how much they loved the Vera Bradley line. I, on the other hand, stood by in amusement as I watched him watching them, speechless and thunderstruck.

Eventually they moved to a table where they began to address the issues at hand. By this time they were in such accord that any possible conflict was averted, decisions were made amiably and a new relationship was forged.

This happened Thursday. Today, I am still chuckling to myself at the memory of my husband's bewilderment and the look on his face. I think almost any man watching this scenario would have reacted similarly. Not so a woman. We understand the importance of shared experiences and the enjoyment found in the little things in life. When we find common ground in something as mundane as a purse it creates a bond and allows us to hear each other on a deeper level.

Watching the incident unfold made me realize how much I enjoy being a woman, and how sorry I am for men who probably think a discussion about purses is shallow and meaningless. Sadly they don't realize that important relationships can begin with something seemingly insignificant only to be forged into a powerful experience.

We have long heard about dressing for success in a power suit. I would suggest that adding a power purse is a "must". It can even be a pretty fabric handbag, designed by Vera Bradley, which holds a computer, a cell phone and other "office on the go" items. Perhaps even Vera doesn't realize the secret weapon her purses hold - that of ice breaker and relationship builder.

TWENTY-FIVE HOLIDAY GOOD DEEDS

2011-12-04T23:53:00.000-08:00

Last year I blogged about inventing an advent calendar for kids while also sharing the religious meaning of advent. It included 25 activities children could enjoy as they counted off the days until Christmas. In looking back I think it is worth revisiting, and you can do that by going to my article of November 28, 2010 called "The advent calendar for kids - secular vs. Christian."

This year I suggest trying something different. How about if we adults mark off the days until Christmas by giving something back to others in twenty-five different ways. You can think of it as your own personal advent calendar of giving. Here are some ideas.

1. A favorite expression in the last decade is called "paying it forward". Give a small amount of money at the next drive-through food or coffee house, and tell the window attendant to apply it towards the purchase of the person behind you. You can suggest that he tell the lucky recipient to pass it on if he or she is able.

2. Buy a poinsettia and put it on the doorstep of a family you know has little money and few bright spots. Include a card that says "Happy Holidays."

3. Visit a nearby assisted living or nursing home and offer to be a personal shopper for residents who might find it difficult or impossible to buy holiday presents for their family members.

4. Do the same thing at a similar home for the elderly, only let the task be helping with choosing and sending out Christmas cards to their loved ones.

5. Buy or make a cake to celebrate December birthdays at a nursing home. In fact, commit to doing it monthly starting in January. My mother and her friend Stella arranged monthly birthday parties for a Bellingham facility, providing goodwill and caring for all concerned.

6. If you have a neighbor with young children, offer to baby sit while the mother does some errands.

7. For young couples with little money "date nights" are sometimes non-existent. Provide babysitting for a date night. If you have some extra money throw in a couple of tickets at a nearby movie theater.

8. If you have a truck or large SUV offer to bring home a Christmas tree from a lot or farm for a family whose car is too small to accomplish the task. Such a truck could also be used for hauling junk to a dump so that a vehicle does not need to be rented.

9. Offer to clean house for someone who has been ill or has been going through a stressful time.

10. Call a friend with whom you have not been in contact and renew the friendship.

11. Any activity that brings excitement or pleasure to others can be considered a good deed in my book. Inviting friends in for a popcorn and video night generates well being and caring. The same can be said for ideas #12-#16.

12. Have a white elephant party where people bring unwanted beautifully wrapped gifts to exchange. The old saying that one person's white elephant can be another person's prize applies.

13. Have a book exchange party where the invited guests bring beautifully wrapped books to share with others. Wanting others to know about a book you have enjoyed is a thoughtful gesture.

14. Cookie baking and decorating can be a reminder of simpler days. Have guests bring their favorite cookies for exchanging with each other. Even more fun is when the guests actually make and bake the cookies that night. Have plenty of milk on hand. Milk and cookies....um-ummm! Hosting such an evening takes time and talent, and can certainly qualify as a good deed if guests leave with a warm memory.

15. Think about days gone by. Decide you will make root beer this year. See the youtube indicated here for directions as to how.

16. If your root beer has been made early in December, plan to make ice cream later in the month. The site here shows how to make ice cream several different ways. You can even have a homemade root beer float party.

17. Apply the adage "Charity begins at home." If you are a husband, put some zest in your love life by forgoing your favorite TV program and taking your wife/significant other out on the town. An inexpensive date could be a movie followed by appetizers and wine at a romantic cocktail lounge. Tell your "date" to dress up, then make sure to tell her how terrific she looks.

18. If you are a wife/significant other, tell your man you are taking him out to a place he will enjoy. Depending on the venue, tell him how to dress. Whether it is a wrestling match, football game, or billiards, make it special for HIM. Tell him how wonderful he is and how much you appreciate him.

19. Hugs and kisses are free. If they are in short supply at your house, decide to show more affection every day to your loved ones, adults and kids alike.

20. Leave loving notes in unexpected places in the house. Such notes found in places like often used drawers, medicine cabinets, cupboards or lunch boxes are morale and love boosters.

21. If you have been estranged from a family member, decide to show forgiveness by making contact and ending the estrangement. Food is a great way to break the ice, and you can make arrangements to drop by with some kind of special treat, and the words "I'm sorry" ready to be spoken.

22. Either on your own or with others decide how you can make the holidays more joyful for service men and women who are far from home and loved ones. Go to a site such as "Care package and equipment suggesetions for deployed military," for ideas and directions.

23. Go through your cupboards and put together a bag of food items that are still useable. Deliver them to your local food bank. These banks can be found on line simply by typing in the words "food banks in Seattle" for example.

24. Helping the needy anytime is a good thing, but helping the needy during the holidays is particularly satisfying. Go to a site listed here under that heading, and you will find many useful ideas.

25. Attending a church Christmas Eve service, with its candles and music would be a wonderful way to complete your holiday activities. Bring along someone who no longer drives to make it especially meaningful.

These are just a few ways to bring pleasure and add meaning to your life and the lives of others. I close with a quote by William James. "Act as if what you do makes a difference. It does."

O.K. THANKSGIVING, I SURRENDER!

2011-11-27T21:53:00.000-08:00

Next Thanksgiving I am running away, hopefully with my husband, and possibly with a few others who might like a different kind of holiday celebration. What has prompted this shocking view of what has always been a favorite holiday of mine? Simple. For the second year in a row I have planned a traditional meal for up to 25 guests only to be sabotaged by such mundane occurrences as illness, family drama or the weather.

I get it, I really do. One doesn’t schedule sickness or the weather, and “stuff” happens. But when it happens the “day of” after the 22 lb. turkey is dressed and in the oven, the green bean, sweet potato, squash and onion casseroles assembled, potatoes peeled for cooking and mashing, two kinds of stuffing, homemade cranberry dressing ready to go, and specialty rolls for twenty plus people purchased, the cost in toil and treasure mounts up. For the same cost a group of several could easily go to a nice restaurant or other venue and enjoy a hearty meal.

Getting back to Thursday’s dinner. Two of Murphy’s laws played a role.

1. If anything can go wrong, it will.

2. If there is a possibility of several things going wrong, the one that will cause the most damage will be the first one to go wrong.

Lots of things went wrong, starting with the one causing the most damage - the legitimate cancellations by various invitees. Wanting all sixteen guests to sit at the same table I had put two tables together and, along with my daughter, set the table with the best china, crystal goblets and silverware, placing specially purchased holiday décor on every surface. This, of course, meant six table settings needed to be removed because of the cancellations.

The 22 lb. turkey was in the oven at the appointed time, but did not comply with the cooking directions or the meat thermometer. Scheduled for a 5:00 p.m. dinner, it was far from done, and was finally served at 6:30 p.m. - the inner part still looking too red for me. All side dishes, ready for 5:00 p.m., spent an undue amount of time being kept warm, and getting a bit dry in the process. With all the turmoil several appetizers were forgotten as was the homemade cranberry sauce.

Three of the guests were a 4-month old, a 17 month old and a two-year old. They were amazingly good all in all, the latter two discovering each other and getting along well. But their stomachs were geared to 5:00 p.m., so anyone understanding children, will also understand a certain amount of unhappiness with the revised schedule. It was not my finest hour in the kitchen, but everyone ate their fill and expressed appreciation. Probably I am my worst critic.

Adding to the confusion was a drenching rain causing flooding and damage in a room where my daughter was staying temporarily. Since weather, namely snow, played a huge role with our 2010 Thanksgiving meal and its cancellations, it seems like a sign that I should give up mega dinners and do something different.

Looking ahead to next year, here is a thought. A short drive to picture pretty Leavenworth will surely get us in the mood for the holidays. I checked online for a good restaurant and this is what I found at J.J. Hill’s restaurant in Icicle Inn. My taste buds are already getting prepared for 2012. Does anyone want to join us? Start planning today.

Our Thanksgiving Day dinner next year could look like the one below for this year!

Start with sun-dried tomato and basil crostini with smoked Gouda cheese,
fresh fruit and fresh baked breads with creamy butter.

Enjoy a crisp fresh salad with our special recipe dressings from our salad assortment along with our apple slaw, holiday pasta salad, fruited gelatin or
Warm up with a bowl of winter squash soup.

For the main course: J J Hills Fresh Grill special roasted turkey or cranberry glazed slow cooked ham, apple and cranberry cornbread stuffing sautéed seasoned green beans with bacon and onions, pineapple baked sweet potatoes, creamy mashed red potatoes with chef made turkey gravy, and sweet roasted winter squash

Wonderful desserts include pumpkin dessert with fresh whipped cream, chocolate decadent cake with raspberry Melba sauce, streusel topped berry pie, apple bread pudding with rum sauce, and more selections

Coffee and tea service, soda, or milk.

Pricing per person:
Adults: 27.95, Children six to ten 15.95, three to five 9.95, two and under are free
State sales tax and gratuity not included.

A THANKSGIVING POEM ABOUT SHARING AND CARING

2011-11-20T14:19:00.000-08:00

"The Pilgrims made seven times more graves than huts. No Americans have been more impoverished than these who, nevertheless, set aside a day of thanksgiving." ~H.U. Westermayer

It's that time of year - a time of thanksgiving.

A time for communing. A time of forgiving.

Of starting the dinner with a heartfelt blessing

Then gorging on turkey, and gravy and dressing

Adding cranberries, 'tatoes, and two kinds of pie

It's a feast, beyond measure, that none can deny.

Start dieting now so you can eat what you will

forgetting remorse as you eat to your fill.

And if there are those with no place to go

make room at your table letting everyone know

that your home is a place of compassion and caring

on this day of conversing, well being and sharing.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO ALL!

ON PROTECTING CHILDREN - OUR NATION'S MOST VALUABLE ASSET

2011-11-13T23:58:00.000-08:00

The news is shocking – the rape of a ten year old in a football locker room at Penn State, as witnessed by a coaching assistant. That this abuse took place a dozen years ago, and is apparently only one of many other instances of unreported sexual abuse in following years, adds to the disbelief and horror. That the alleged perpetrator was a highly respected coach is even more difficult to stomach. It’s the hot topic on every news program.

Perhaps the only one who gains is Rick Perry, whose recent embarrassing debate performance is temporarily on the back burner at CNN, MSNBC and FOX. Millions of people are transfixed by events unfolding at this prestigious university and involving its equally prestigious coaching staff. Arrests have been made and high level heads have rolled, from a nationally famous head football coach to a well respected college president. There is endless chatter about how the football program should be penalized, that the season be ended and that no possible post-bowl game be allowed. The latter I have a hard time understanding. This has nothing to do with the young men who have worked hard on the field, and hopefully in the academic arena. They should not be punished for the behavior of individuals long before their time. On the other hand, this should be used as an object lesson for all of us on the importance of getting involved when we see wrong doing.

In the meantime we ask ourselves "How could this have happened?" Criticism of the football assistant who saw, but did nothing to stop the abuse, is rampant. That he didn’t call the police immediately has added to public ire. That folks reporting the incident up the chain of command, and somehow never following up, is beyond understanding. That rumors have circulated for years about the abuser, but no serious investigation was ever made is even more galling to those of us who value children and their need to be protected from danger.

As a teacher the whole scenario is particularly troublesome and hard to comprehend. Our country has very specific laws to protect children and they are clearly spelled out state by state on the Child Welfare Information Gateway web site. Do the smart people at Penn State not know their resonsibilities and their options? If the young man was fearful for his job, it would have been a simple matter to call the Child Welfare department and report what happened. The burden is then on them to investigate and let the authorities know the nature of the problem or crime. I myself once had to report a case of suspected physical abuse to Child Protective Services (CPS) even though it was scary and I was worried about possible reprisals from hostile parents. I knew what I had to do, and I knew whom to call. In Washington CPS is found under the Washington State Department of Social and Health Services.

In discussing this with a teacher friend today, we agreed that protecting children, even beyond the school grounds, is important. She told me that one day when coming down I-90 from Snoqualmie Pass she observed a small child running along side a slow moving car. Fearing that something was seriously wrong she pulled in front of the other car forcing it to stop. The parents were in the car, with the child outside trying to get back in. The mother was very angry at my friend for butting in. She was “teaching her child a lesson” and this was the punishment meted out. My friend told her there were better ways to handle the situation and that the parents were risking their child’s life. Afterwards she followed their car, got the license number, and called first the police who said they could do nothing, and then CPS who also was unable to assist without more information. She called the police again, and finally they agreed to go to the address indicated by the license number to see what they could do. My friend was indeed taking seriously the need to report this child abuse. If only the young teaching assistant had had the courage to do the same! For it does take courage as well as a strong moral conviction.

Mandatory reporters of child abuse and neglect include health care workers, school personnel, child care providers, mental health workers, persons connected to the court, law enforcement officers, members of the clergy, government employees connected with families, employees of orgnizations that receive federal funding, and more. The CWIG has a complete list of each state's requirements. Another site that has valuable information is the Child Welfare League of America . I say that each of us should be mandatory reporters of child abuse, and if you see such a thing happening, you must act. If you cannot physically do so in the moment, you can at least report the transgression to your local child protective service.

We all know the somewhat trite saying that "It takes a village to raise a child." Never is it more important than when our children are at risk. As members of our national village we must step in to right these wrongs!

HOW TO PREPARE A PERFECT PRIME RIB ROAST FOR THAT ALL IMPORTANT DINNER

2011-11-06T20:31:00.000-08:00

"One of the delights of life is eating with friends; second to that is talking about eating; and, for an unsurpassed double whammy, there is talking about eating while you are eating with friends." Laurie Colwin "Home Cooking"

Yesterday was special. We were meeting the parents of a delightful young woman who our son greatly fancies. Her family was visiting from California and we jointly decided on a get acquainted dinner at our cabin, literally a stone's throw away from the high tide line on the Strait of Georgia. This particular young man has waited all of his 40+ years for Ms. Right, and we have stood by, hands clenched and mouths firmly shut as some nice but unsuitable girlfriends joined us at various dinner tables. This one was a "keeper" according to all who had met her on Labor Day weekend and we set about to do our part in planning a great evening.

Since good food helps with a good impression, and sparing no cost, we decided on a menu of prime rib roast, twice baked potatoes, mixed veggies, French bread, and green salad. Marsala mushrooms, sauteed onions, sour cream and chives would be available for toppings. Blueberry cream cheese pie would be the finishing touch. We prayed that no one was a vegetarian.

Since my stepsons are all chef wanabees, they usually take charge in the kitchen when in town. In their absence we needed to step up and get the job done well. After determining we would go for "medium" we consulted our memories, cook books and the internet. Vaughn set off to buy the roast, a better roasting pan and a meat thermometer. When he returned we talked about how to best prepare an 8 pound roast (at $9.00 per pound), and Vaughn decided he was going to go by internet instructions and the new meat thermometer. I, Mrs. Worrywart, wanted to also check the meat market personnel at Haggen's and QFC. Therein lay the rub. The instructions were different. One meat expert said to take the roast out when the thermometer reached l35 degrees and let it sit for ten minutes to continue cooking. A meat lady at another store said to let the thermometer reach 160 then take it out for half an hour. These instructions were based on a 4-6 pound roast. Ours, at 8 pounds, was in the 6-8 pound range. Internet instructions varied. So this is what we did:

We preheated the oven to 450 degrees and put the salted and peppered roast in our new roasting pan for 15 minutes. We turned the temperature down to 325 degrees and continued to roast the meat for about three hours total. When Vaughn removed the roast from the oven the thermometer said l55 degrees. He covered it and let it continue to "cook" on the cutting board for another half hour. My tender heart rebelled at the sight of blood (juice, my husband called it) trickling over the edge of the cutting board and landing on the floor. In the best of times I have to have my meat VERY well done and liberally doused with catsup. The rest of my family likes the meat walked though a warm room. Ugh!

In the meantime, our guests arrived with smiles of delight, commenting on all the delicious smells emanating from the kitchen, and bearing a homemade pecan pie. Wine was served, appetizers were consumed, and conversation was spirited. I had set the table with the remaining roses from a bedraggled garden. Candles lit every corner, and a cheery fire blazed in the fireplace. Perfect ambience for a perfect dinner. And it was a perfect dinner. Absolutely everything went according to plan, and the roast could not have tasted better anywhere, even at Ruth's Chris Steakhouse.

As a new social connection was formed I thought about the importance of eating and entertaining in building relationships. Would this one become permanent? Only time will tell, but we love our son's lady friend and her parents are charming and friendly. We even discovered that most likely a study of our various family trees will show a blood connection between this family and one of our other daughters-in-law. We smile at the thought. This really goes beyond 6 degrees of separation!

After our guests left we continued to bask in candle glow, the dying embers of the fire, and a sense of hope for the future of this couple and those of us, who stand by in support. This is family at its best. A blended family at that. For this I thank my husband who cheerfully makes all things possible and continues to be a role model for greatness as a person and as a parent and step parent.

THE GHOST OF JOHN FROM A CHILD'S PERSPECTIVE

2011-10-30T23:50:00.000-07:00

Every year at this time I find myself thinking back to when my children were young and filled with the delicious spooky anticipation of Halloween. One early memory was of a nearby haunted house created by neighborhood children, and located in an abandoned, dilapidated garage. Converted for one night into an authentic spooky shack, it was the perfect venue; and thirty-five years later the garage yet stands, in even greater disrepair, still bearing a sign reading DANGER in red on an old wooden plank.

One vivid memory was of my five year old son who pleaded with us to take him inside, then buried his head in his dad’s shoulder the entire time, too afraid to look at the headless creatures, spooks, witches, and ghouls playacting inside.

It was also during this time that he learned a song in pre-school about a “lippy chilly” and for the life of me I couldn’t figure out what a lippy chilly was. With mounting frustration he tried to make me understand but I just didn’t get it. Imagine my surprise when, years later, as an elementary school teacher, I heard the children singing a song in music class called “The Ghost of John.”

Have you seen the ghost of John?

Long white bones with the skin all gone.
Oooh Oooh Ooh.

Wouldn’t it be chilly with no skin on?

One Lippy Chilly became “Wouldn’t it be chilly”, and it all now made sense. By this time my son was grown and we had a good laugh over his perspective and articulation of the lyrics. The song lives on, and Youtube has many examples. Enjoy this particular rendition of “The Ghost of John”.

Somehow Halloween seemed less contrived back in the day. Costumes were homemade and simple, and the night was mainly for kids. Now adults have gotten into the act, holding onto their childhood with ghoulish fervor, as they enjoy elaborate costume parties and dressing up for work. Even the checkers at our local supermarket are decked out. Downtown Edmonds is cordoned off and children come away with bags of candy and treats, as they go from one store to another. Mega haunted houses sponsored by various organizations, and commanding a healthy entrance fee, abound. They make that little old garage look insignificant by comparison, but no one will ever convince my children that theirs was anything but the best spooky experience ever. Hopefully one thing will live on for generations to come and that's the "lippy chilly" in "The Ghost of John"

For now, a happy Halloween to you all. May your treats be many, your tricks be few, and your costumes be adding to our economy during these financially strapped times.

TO COMPUTE OR NOT TO COMPUTE. THAT IS THE QUESTION.

2011-10-23T23:54:00.000-07:00

I just read an article in the NY Times this morning entitled “A Silicon Valley School That Doesn’t Compute”. I feel driven to respond.

My credentials: I’m a public school teacher. The bulk of my career was in an inner city elementary school whose student population was predominantly African American. Over 80% were on free or reduced lunches, and many came from single parent households. My own children went through the Mercer Island public school system, and received good educations. Much of that time I was a single parent myself with all the financial constraints that implies.

The article states that employees of several major Silicon Valley high tech firms send their children to the Waldorf school in Los Altos, largely because of its century-old method of experiential learning, creative thinking, human interaction, movement and the teaching tools from yesteryear. Tools include blackboards, colored chalk, encyclopedias, wooden desks, workbooks, and number 2 pencils. Tools do NOT include computers, ipads or smart phones. In fact, they are not allowed in the classrooms, and students are even discouraged from using them at home. The article claimed that a study between 1994 and 2004 showed that a remarkable 95% of Waldorf graduates attended college.

For those enamoured with the Waldorf teaching approach, engagement of the students in the process seems to be the key to learning. Use of technology is seen as distracting from that engagement. One student talked about how frustrating it was to hang out with his cousins who were all wired into their various gadgets. They were not paying attention to each other or to him. It was technology vs. socializing with socializing the loser.

The picture painted in the article is compelling, but disquieting.

With an annual tuition ranging from $17,750 to $24,400, I think it is clear that unless there is a scholarship involved, most students come from high achieving families who value education. These families have undoubtedly read to their children, taken them on trips and exposed them to all kinds of cultural experiences which contribute to their knowledge base. They were probably dandled on their parents' laps, in front of a computer, from an early age.

Compare them with students of low income homes, many with single parents just eking out a living, who find that TV, with its seductive programming, is their stepparent. Often their real parents have no time, desire or energy to fully parent their children to be competitive in the school or workplace.

In this article, students come from homes where the family’s financial success is tied to one of several technology companies located in the Silicon Valley. Many of these parents want their children to have experiential learning and look for schools that will provide it. They are not concerned with Waldorf’s ban against technology as they undoubtedly provide for that within their own homes.

However, the low income student might have no opportunity to learn computer skills unless it is at school. At the same time, those of us in the public school arena know that there isn’t nearly enough quality computer instruction, computers are often not working properly, and technicians to repair them are not readily available. The result is a widening group of technology “haves and have nots.”

Sadder yet is that realization that with so much stress on academic accountability, public school teachers often are forced to sacrifice what little experiential learning they can offer to the all important test scores.

Personally I love experiential learning. I liked teaching about Ancient Egypt by turning my classroom into a pyramid, finding artifacts in an archeological dig made with cat litter, piecing together bits of broken pottery, designing a sarcophagus, making scarab necklaces, AND to visit a hieroglyphics translator site on the internet in order to transform our names.

I would not want a classroom devoid of computers and the internet. There is so much information to be learned and no one teacher can know it all. It is how teachers use the technology that makes the difference. I am happy if a computer free classroom works for the Waldorf students, but I was thrilled that the world was but a click away for mine.

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The following is an experience based lesson plan I designed for use in my various primary classrooms. This plan includes using the internet for activities and research. When the students have completed their learning, they put on teacher hats and invite students from other classrooms into their room for an armchair field trip.

LESSON PLAN: Ancient Egyptian Holiday

Objective: The students will learn about an ancient culture through “hands on” experiences relating to that culture. These experiences will expose the learners to a deep understanding of the concepts taught and a rich vocabulary pertaining to the concepts.

Method used: Teaching and Learning Through Multiple Intelligences

Room 103 first graders (junior archeologists) will pass on their own learning and understanding of an ancient Egyptian culture to kindergarten through second graders (junior archeologists-in- training) via classroom centers. Egyptian music will be played. Student teachers (junior archeologists) will be wearing appropriate costumes.

Vocabulary: archeologist, a dig, map, Africa, Egypt, Nile River, Pharaoh, pyramid, tomb, cartouche, papyrus, picture writing, hieroglyphics, scarab, mummy, sarcophagus, burial box, burial jar, sun god, tomb,

Centers:

1. Archeological Dig (kinesthetic) Find artifacts such as jewels and broken dishes buried in sand,

understand their importance, and attempt to reconstruct them.

2. Map Work and Pyramid Making (logical-mathematical) Find Egypt on a map of Africa. Locate and trace the Nile River. Build a paper pyramid to place on the map.

3. Make a cartouche with hieroglyphics (Verbal-Linguistic) and (Intrapersonal) Students will learn how to make their own names in hieroglyphics and find out how to check for accuracy on a special computer site.

4. Make a Scarab Necklace (visual-spatial) Learn what a scarab is and its significance. Be able to make a necklace with a scarab and several beads to show artistic balance.

5. Learn about the ancient belief that for a pharaoh to pass to his next life he wants the same body and his belongings. Learn the importance of the mummy process. Learn about the ornate coffin called a sarcophacus. (Interpersonal)

Note: Authentic background music will provide the musical intelligence.

THE DEMISE OF THE SUNDAY DRIVE

2011-10-16T23:22:00.000-07:00

Today was beautiful in the way that a Pacific Northwest day in October can be picture perfect. Crisp, brilliant sun taking away the chill, the smell of wood smoke on the air, a last chance to be strolling outdoors without a coat.

"It's too beautiful to work indoors," my husband said, "What do you want to do today?" He suggested a walk on the beach followed by a game of cribbage and an early dinner. "How about a Sunday drive?" I asked, fully aware that he would know exactly what I had in mind. Ever up for any good idea, he acquiesced, and we set forth in my little red Mitsubishi Eclipse Spyder.

For our generation, Sunday drives were frequent weekend outings, with everyone piled in the car, and no particular destination in mind. Just a chance to be together, scoping out other houses, yards, people and lifestyles. Cheap entertainment in those days, with gas at $.29 per gallon. My mom would throw together a lunch usually consisting of fried chicken, potato salad, rolls, pickles, chocolate cake, and any other tasty addition for an impromptu picnic at an exciting location like Birch Bay, Mount Baker, Wiser Lake or Donavan Park. While our parents gossiped, gawked and oohed over the scenery we played invented games in the back seat. Games like twenty questions, counting silos, and checking out the license plates of passing cars. The latter was particularly exciting if a car bore a California plate or some other faraway state - almost as if seeing the car meant we somehow had a connection to that distant land.

In between games, as the world passed by outside our windows, we gained a sense of our community, an understanding of local geography, and a feeling of belonging as we participated in these family field trips. Unbeknownst to our parents, they were providing us with educational gifts. Our imaginations, observation and thinking skills were being honed, and they helped us pass the miles and hours, contributing to the nostalgia I feel when looking back.

I think few of today's children will have memories like mine as they listen to their ipods, focus on their game boys, or watch movies on a backseat television screen. It is unlikely they will see the pheasant startled from its hiding place, the deer in the woods, or the eagle soaring in the sky. Intent on their toys, they will probably miss the spectacular wild flowers growing alongside the road, or catch the scent of newly mown grass.

According to Wikipedia the Sunday drive came out of the 1920s and 30s, when the idea was put forth that the car was to be used for pleasure as well as commuting and errands. The practice continued through the 20th century and seems almost passe in these early years of the 21st century. Sadly, rising gas prices have dealt a death knell to this truly American pastime. That and the need to fill our children's lives with structured play, sports, and activities that do not promote learning about our surroundings, expand our powers of observation or promote family togetherness.

I find myself wondering what children fifty years from now will be remembering with nostalgia. They will undoubtedly know a lot about the world because of technology, but will they have taken time to smell the roses, guess the answer to "twenty questions", or sit in the back seat of the family car making memories that will last a lifetime? Without lower gas prices and serious effort on the part of parents, probably not. I, however, remain thankful that Sunday drives were part of my childhood. By the way, for those of you unfamiliar with farming lingo, silos are storage structures for storing livestock feed. Click on the word to learn more and see pictures of what we used to count.

With one foot in the past, and one in the future, I "surfed the net" and found a wonderful tune called "Sunday Drive" by Dean Brody. Enjoy his youtube offering about a wonderful experience that is now part of the good old days.

I CAN SEE CLEARLY NOW - NO MORE "IF ONLYS"

2011-10-09T18:59:00.000-07:00

For most older adults problems kids have are often "out of sight, out of mind" when one's own are grown and gone. We often forget how baffling, frustrating, and even guilt inducing parenting was, especially in the teenage years. Add the burden of single parenting and looking back is often just too painful.

Lately the world inhabited by children has been on my mind, probably because I am back to subbing in the afternoons. It forces me to view them differently, and to think about all the "woulda-coulda-shouldas" and "if onlys" in my own parenting. Since I became a teacher long after I became a parent, one of the big ones was If only I had children after I had taught for a while I would have made better parenting decisons. When my husband left our young family, with little warning, there were dozens of "if onlys".

Instead of allowing grief to consume me, if only I had insisted that we work together with chores and daily routines, we would have learned to cooperate and care more about each other, which in turn would have lessened our shared sorrow.

If only I hadn't allowed my creative juices to be squelched because of my own heartache we would have gotten through our family crisis with a modicum of ease and even fun.

If only I hadn't stopped at McDonalds many times each week because I was too tired to cook (fast food that was often eaten while watching TV) my children would have learned more about each other, as well as better table manners.

If only I had taught my kids to plan menus, shop carefully for groceries, and take turns cooking, my children would have learned lifelong culinary and household skills.

Kids love to help out from their youngest years. If only I had made chores fun, my children would have learned the importance of and taken pride in cleaning their rooms, setting the table, washing the dishes, doing the laundry, taken out the trash, help with yard work. These are important skills that parents need to teach their children in order that they become responsible, effective adults and good future mates. I have since realized children can find chores to be rewarding and fulfilling, allowing a chance to grow.

Instead of wallowing in my own grief, if only I had paid attention to and taken to heart the lyrics of Johnny Nash's song "I Can See Clearly Now" I would have faced our family's crisis differently, and my children would have come through the rain with greater confidence, self esteem, and happier memories.

Now, in every classroom in which I substitute I see examples of suffering children whose parents are going through their own rainy days. If only I could reach out in some meaningful way to each of them, then possibly they would be able to feel a little better, and know that a bright sunshiny day will come their way.

Yes, looking back if only I knew then what I know now, my own children would have had a happier and easier life. But the problem with if onlys is that they're in the past and nothing can be done to change them. If we want to make a difference we must do it NOW. And now that is my commitment to children with whom I come in contact, in my family, in the classroom, and in the world at large.

So, last week, for the little Somalian boy who wanted to show how high he could kick in class, I made time to watch him on the playground at recess. He really could kick high. His beaming face was thanks enough. I gave a child who was told "no" by a classroom teacher, when he wanted to look more closely at a read-aloud book, an opportunity to read the book later during silent reading time. When a child was sharply rebuked by a recess supervisor, I took a minute to crouch down by the young offender to determine what had happened. Once his side of the story came out, and he felt heard, he went off happily to play.

These are small but important differences we can make in the lives of kids whose parents are too consumed by their own pain to think about the hurts of their children. For the coming week, why don't you see how many obstacles you can help people overcome, even if it's only listening with empathy. Help them to realize that tomorrow CAN be a bright, bright, sun-shiny day

Lyrics for "I Can See Clearly Now" as sung by Johnny Nash

I can see clearly now, the rain is gone,
I can see all obstacles in my way
Gone are the dark clouds that had me blind
It’s gonna be a bright (bright), bright (bright)
Sun-Shiny day.

I think I can make it now, the pain is gone
All of the bad feelings have disappeared
Here is the rainbow I’ve been prayin?for
It’s gonna be a bright (bright), bright (bright)
Sun-Shiny day.

Look all around, there’s nothin?but blue skies
Look straight ahead, nothin?but blue skies

I can see clearly now, the rain is gone,
I can see all obstacles in my way
Gone are the dark clouds that had me blind
It’s gonna be a bright (bright), bright (bright)
Sun-Shiny day.

OUR VIRTUAL WORLD - LIKE IT OR LUMP IT!

2011-10-02T23:49:00.000-07:00

First Kindle, then I-Pad, now Kindle Fire reader tablets. What is happening to good old fashioned books? And what do futurists say about books and book stores? Scary as it sounds, some predict the end of book stores as we know them and that e-books are the wave of the future. Already cozy little bookstores run by "mom and pop" are biting the economic dust. Big ones too, if you count Borders.

This phenomena has even invaded my own home as my husband, at first resistant, has joined the Kindle cheer leading team. A victim of beginning cataracts he loves the ease of reading his tablet, not to mention that buying a new book is but a few clicks away. Hey! He knows intellectually that he should be walking down to our little local book store to support it and get a dose of daily exercise, but the pull of instant gratification and a tad bit of laziness play into his love affair with his electronic tablet.

I am a hold out, and hope to remain that way for as long as possible. My love of books began before grade school even started. Later, as a proud member of the top Brownie reading group in my first grade class I was filled with awe as I followed the antics of Dick, Jane, and Spot, followed by Grimm's Fairy Tales, Nancy Drew, Nurse Cheryl Ames, and every Zane Grey western novel written. As a farm girl I sat perched high in a cedar tree, lost for hours in one story or another, with the Bookmobile my weekly supplier of new adventures. The school library was my favorite room at school, replaced only by the Bellingham city library when I was older.

I loved all the trappings of the classroom, the smell of crayons, the colorful posters, finger painting, and the three R's. Well, maybe not 'rithmetic. But everything else. And above all , books and reading. Even at night, after the lights were supposed to be out and I was tucked in my bed, I would sneak a book and a flashlight under the covers in order to read a little bit more. And I was not alone. Many of us at my small country school found escape in reading, then play acting out the stories at recess. I still remember the deliciously suspenseful story of Blue Beard and the locked room that no one could enter. Books were a window on a world filled with fantasy, realism and dreams. They helped to shape what we became and promoted human interaction as well.

Now, as an elementary school teacher, I watch children still finding joy in reading the old fashioned way and discussing their favorite stories. The book mobile is gone, but the virtual classroom is not a reality yet, thank goodness. I hope the futurists have it wrong, and that books will be there for future generations.

Yes, technology is changing how we read, but even more how we relate to each other. Besides ordering books from our homes, we can shop, bank, buy food, play games, talk to others all over the world, even have intimate conversations with total strangers. With telecommuting some folks don't even have to leave the comfort of their homes during any given day. Even going to church becomes a passive experience. I believe that creativity is one of our national strengths, but I fear it will be harmed without the excitement of sharing ideas with one another face to face.

And while I am mourning the change in our nation's reading habits, let me also mourn the gradual passing away of the newspaper world. Luckily I can still sit with my now skinny Seattle Times and a cup of coffee while I read about the day's events. But I can see the handwriting creeping slowly up the wall. Classifieds tell the sad story. Want to rent an apartment, get a job or find a garage sale? Forget the Times and go to Craig's List. It's free and comprehensive. I know I'm guilty of having advertised a rental home there, and what's more, I got results quickly and for free. FREE. Sadly, newspapers can't compete with that. As the romantic and slower paced day of horses and buggies have passed into history, so too may newspapers, books and book stores. Will I soon be reading about the good old days on a Kindle Fire? In this crazy world, probably.

I guess I just have to accept a future with technology invading every aspect of my daily life. Let's face it. I love my computer, my cell phone, looking up stuff on the internet, and yes, I confess it, texting. I just want the world to slow down a bit so that little kids in the future can climb trees with books and not worry about the battery dying.

TWEENAGER TO TEENAGER - FROM A GRANDMA'S POINT OF VIEW

2011-09-25T23:50:00.000-07:00

One of our granddaughters just turned thirteen and I watched in awe as a little girl was transformed into young womanhood. Last summer she and her friends played on the beach, built sand castles and watched cartoons. This year they lay on their stomachs reading People magazines, texting and talking. What a difference a year makes! I am so lucky that her parents did a fine job of helping her be ready for the next phase of her life. I can relax knowing that with any luck, the dangerous shoals of adolescence will be successfully navigated.

I have so many memories of my own teenage years, some of them painful, others helping to determine my future. One anecdote I can relate had to do with dating. My father had a rule that there would be NO dating until his six daughters reached the age of sixteen. Since I did not reach sixteen until December of my junior year, it seemed extremely unfair. As a thirteen-year old freshman I had a crush on a senior basketball star who seemed to feel the same about me. During the entire year our relationship was confined to dancing at school dances to which my father took me and picked me up, seeing each other in the school hallways, and watching "my love" play basketball. On one glorious occasion he came over and handed me his special school hat at a game for all to see. My heart went totally crazy. That night and for many other nights I slept with it under my pillow, the scent of "Old Spice" coloring my dreams.

It all ended at the senior prom. He finally asked me out and I decided to see if my dad would change his mind for this all important event. I picked a good time, used every persuasive ounce I could muster, and asked my father if I could go. Of course he said "no" and I remember flouncing away pronouncing that I hated him, so that he could fully experience my ire. Of course "my love" asked someone else to the dance, and to make matters worse it was one of my classmates. I carried the torch for a couple of years until I finally realized that my dad was a pretty wise guy. By the way, it never even occurred to me to sneak out, so my parents must have done something right in that department.

Here's a little poem I made up in honor of teens and their parents. Perhaps it will help to not take everything so seriously. Of course, my wisdom came too late to apply during my own parenting of teens years ago. Enjoy.

It's fun to be the grandma of a brand new teen
to watch the changes taking place and what those changes mean.
Farewell to childhood fancies, hello to distant looks
when friends mean more than family, and texting more than books.

And watching takes me back in time to my own teenage days
when life was all about "the now" and what each person says.
How wonderful and awful as we strove to understand,
rejecting counsel from our folks who tried to lend a hand.

To families of this strange new being I have one thing to say
If you laid a good foundation, you'll soon see a better day.
In the meantime, try to remember how important it was to fit in.
Use empathy and humor. . . be the parent you wish yours had been.

TEN TRIED AND TRUE RULES FOR REACHING A GOLDEN WEDDING ANNIVERSARY

2011-09-18T17:05:00.000-07:00

This is the story of K and E who reached fifty years of marriage with grace and love this summer. K and I were college roommates in the late l950s and lived together for our junior year abroad in Stockholm, Sweden. Our adventures were legion - a story to be told another time. Suffice it to say that upon our return we didn't seem to fit in with our previous peers and looked to the foreign student population at our university for socializing. Upon being invited to an off-campus house made up of students from Panama, Argentina, and Spain we found the international flavor we were missing and began a months-long relationship that ended in my leaving for Los Angeles and K's marriage to E. During this time we danced the tango, cha-cha and paso dobles, ate ethnic foods, had spirited conversations about the relevant topics of the day, and shared some of our culture with visits to family homes, tourist sights, and waking "the boys" up with coffee and pastry as we performed a Santa Lucia celebration, complete with candle lighted crowns, for our new friends. It was a magical time and indelible memories were made for all of us

Almost from the first moment they saw each other K and E fell in love. The love deepened over time and they were married within a year. K had finished college and E was working toward a doctorate degree in one of the biology fields. K's parents were disappointed as they really wanted her to take over her family's apple and horse ranches. E would not have fit in, they decided. They were worried about the kind of life their daughter would have and where they would live.

They worried needlessly because E's climb up the corporate ladder to the vice presidency of his firm allowed the happy couple and their two children who came later, to live a charmed life all over the globe. As head of the European division they lived in countries like France, England and Belgium at a level most of us would only dream of attaining. A favorite residence was in New York City where they had an apartment in Lincoln Center, allowing them to partake of every cultural event imaginable. Upon retirement they lived in Barcelona for a time before moving to Panama, E's birth country, and an ocean front estate with live-in help, and room to spare for an endless stream of visitors.

So fast forward to this summer. K and E, keeping romance alive, decided to visit every place they had ever lived, and started their trip with the East Coast and a voyage across the Atlantic on the Queen Mary II. Once in Europe they retraced their residential steps and renewed contact with surviving friends there. After a brief return to Panama to rest and regroup they set forth on the last leg of their trip to where it all started, here in Seattle. It was fitting somehow that my present husband, Vaughn, and I were part of this adventure, starting with a road trip to Canada and culminating in a cocktail party at our home in Edmonds. Here, on the last night of their stay, those old college friends from fifty years ago renewed acquaintances , laughing, remembering and listening to E who was the pianist of the group. The only thing missing was the dancing.

Perhaps the highlight for me of the road trip down memory lane was at Trout Lake in Canada, where K and E's sons met up with us, and staged a touching, sentimental tree planting ceremony in a remote section of woods. The property involved was bequeathed to K by her parents. Located near a babbling brook on a wonderfully warm sunny day, the two young men honored their parents' golden wedding anniversary by planting two small cedar trees that hopefully will grow over the years as a testimony to a marriage that has stood the test of time. It touched my heart, and I have to confess to a little envy as it is unlikely that at my age I will attain a "golden" status.

These days with fifty percent of marriages ending in divorce, and countless other relationships broken within a few years, whether or not there are children involved, fifty years mean something. Something big. Something important. During our many hours on the road we talked a lot about the past and about what makes a marriage work. Here are ten golden rules for reaching a golden wedding anniversary:

1. A commitment to the concept of marriage

2. Open two-way communication with active listening, not just waiting for the other to draw breath in order to make your own point.

3. Mutual respect for the other's needs including such things as physical love, nurturing, and interests.

4. Mutual respect for the other's abilities, no matter how large or small. A lawyer has different abilities from a laborer but both lines of work are worthy of respect.

5. At least some shared interests, whether music, cards, walking, traveling, etc.

6. If children are involved keep romance alive by carving out some alone time. Think about traveling on an airline and being told if oxygen masks become necessary, take care of oneself first before attending to the children so that all will survive. Nurturing each other will help the marriage to survive and the children to benefit.

7. Touch, hug, and kiss every day.

8. Resolve angry feelings and arguments by trying to understand the other's viewpoint. Take away red flag words and hurtful accusations.

9. If you're right, don't gloat.

l0. If you're wrong, don't pout.

While I don't anticipate that my husband and I will reach a nifty fifty, here is part of a poem I wrote about us that might be thought provoking, starting with verse seven:

Now it's twenty years later and our love is still strong, though it's been tested during those years. The wisdom we've gained through much stress and strife might help someone else now in tears.

"Let him be him and me be me" is the Number One rule we apply. Respect at all times takes the sting away when cross words do ultimately fly.

We both do our bit and a little bit more for family and others as wello. And the golden rule is paramount, on grudges we do not dwell.

So hopefully these words will help to solve some obstacles on your path. And one more very important thing...take time in your day to laugh.l

A ROAD TRIP DOWN MEMORY LANE COMING SOON

2011-09-11T22:29:00.000-07:00

Two couples, friends since their college days in the fifties, are on a road trip, which started with an airport pick up in Vancouver, B.C., and a Labor Day picnic at Sandy Point, Washington. For one couple, now living in Panama, it’s a summer long celebration of their golden wedding anniversary, as they revisit where they met and places they lived and spent time over the years. This leg of the celebration includes areas of the Pacific Northwest and Canada, with stays in Kamloops, Salmon Arms, Halcyon Springs, Trout Lake, and Grand Forks, B.C. Lake Chelan in Washington is next, and the final destination will be Edmonds, Washington.

I am the self designated recorder of this remarkable adventure, and will be telling you more about it next Sunday. A few months ago I wrote about the importance of celebrations. In these days where marriage is often bypassed by young couples, a committed relationship of fifty years is noteworthy. That the couple's two sons flew in from Boston and D.C. to join us in a remote area of Canada so that they could plant two trees in honor of their parents is also significant. You will love the story of this romance and how to achieve long term wedded bliss. I’ll fill you in next week.

COSTCO TAKES THE LABOR OUT OF YOUR LABOR DAY DINNER!

2011-09-04T00:09:00.000-07:00

Last week my sister had a memorial golf tournament for her husband who died in December. Six of his buddies showed up to pay homage to Rusty's memory at a private local golf course. After the tournament they continued their celebration at my sister's home where she laid out a fine spread purchased mostly at Costco. Everyone raved about the delicious meal, and I, always looking for something to write about, decided that our Labor Day celebratory feast would come exclusively from Costco.

We are having our picnic on Sunday rather than Monday because some of the fourteen guests will be coming from Seattle, and this way they won't have to fight traffic or be up early for work the next day. We have a budget of $l00.00, as impossible as that sounds. This year we will also be entertaining two guests from Panama who love good food and are used to fine dining. They have live-in help including a cook who provides all meals. Will Costco measure up? Do they even have Costco there? Will the food tantalize their taste buds? I guess we'll find out tomorrow, but I have a sneaking hunch they will love this picnic. I know I will, because I've never been disappointed in the food at Costco, and the prep time will be non existent.

The meal will look something like this:

Appetizers:

$13.00 - Assorted cheeses and dips

$ 7.00 - Two kinds of crackers

Main Meal

$ 8.99 - Kirkland all natural meat lasagna (6 lbs.)

$8.99 - Birdseye garlic chicken (includes pasta, white chicken, broccoli, carrots, cor with garlic sauce - 3 lbs.)

$ 3.59 - Parisian salad mix with dressing

$ 4.49 - Sesame poppy rolls

$ 6.00 - Corn on the cob

$ 6.99 - Kerrygold tub of Irish butter for rolls and corn

Dessert

$ 9.99 - Red velvet cake with cream cheese frosting

$ 9.99 Old fashioned lattice apple pie

Celebratory champagne

$ 6.99 Cook's Brut California - 2 liters

The above items total $86.02, and should be totally filling and satisfying; however, we plan to add ice cream and soft drinks which will bring the total to a little over $l00.00. Cook's champagne is fine for toasting, but our Panamanian friends have a wine cellar and very cultivated palates. In their honor I will bring out some fine wines I have been saving for a special occasion. Now I ask you, what could be more special than a splendid meal from Costco in the company of fourteen good friends and relatives, at a cost that many couples fork out just to go to a restaurant on a Saturday night?

We'll critique the meal tomorrow and let you know the results. If I can push myself away from the table I'll sit down at the computer and give you the low down in time for you to rush to your nearest Costco in order to buy a similar meal for Monday, the actual Labor Day holiday. Chow!

THE NEXT DAY: Turned out we had eighteen guests who made short work of our holiday dinner. I polled several of the guests informally afterwards. On a scale of 1 to 5 with 5 being the best, a score of 4 seemed to be the grade most often given. From my view you deserve a 5. The dinner was easy, fun and tasty, So. . . way to go Costco! My mouth is already watering just thinking about future menus.

GARAGE SALES - RECYCLING AT ITS FINEST

2011-08-28T23:29:00.000-07:00

For the past week I have been helping my daughter pack her belongings for a move to another location. Of course the best weather is now upon us after a dreary spring and summer, and we are forced to slave away while watching other people enjoy the many activities a Seattle summer has to offer. All around us folks are boating, dining out on sunlit restaurant terraces, having backyard picnics, soaking up the rays at the beach, and of course, cruising from one garage sale to another, in hopes of finding a million dollar treasure in all the trash. Even the lady across the street, is having one. Luckily my daughter is too busy packing to hit the neighborhood sales or we would have that much more to do. I think it might be safe to say that she has never seen a sign or thrift store she could pass up without a twinge of regret.

Moving takes garage sales and thrift shopping off the table for her and it is a real sacrifice. She is the ultimate collector, buying with an eye to reselling on Etsy. Actually, she really needs her own warehouse/apartment if there is such a thing, in order to display what she has artistically, and get her hands on said items for a quick turnaround. If you were to peek into her window you probably would have one of two reactions. Minimalists would most likely throw up their hands in horror and see only clutter. Collectors, on the other hand would be impressed, finding a tempting array of unusual low brow or objects d’art.

She has a “good eye” and I didn’t realize how special some of her Value Village and garage sale “finds” were until I started packing them. Tiki items of all kinds adorn walls, and fill every nook and cranny. Painted metal angels, statues and unusual religious lighted pictures and statues are tucked here and there. I particularly love her Asian hot air balloon lanterns which float gently in a corner window area, above a fascinating green lamp topped by a red shade. Somehow it works.

Her own photography and paintings of tiki masks take up other wall space providing a peek at the artist she is. The dining table does not see food, but instead houses boxes and boxes of jewelry pieces, old clock parts and other broken bits and pieces that find new life in uniquely designed necklaces and earrings. For example, I am the proud owner of a formerly ordinary locket, antiqued and embellished with a clock face, crystals and a small honeybee which, in terms of jewelry, is a work of art. A side interest is vintage clothing, purses and shoes which fill closets and await a later sale at her store, Remote Luxury, on Etsy. Sadly, like many artists, her day job does not allow for much design time except in the evening, but she is ever hopeful that one day she will turn her hobby into a money making venture.

As I spent the past few days packing, and driving back and forth to a storage unit, passing dozens of garage sale signs on my way, I begin to realize how important these weekend events are to our culture. They are truly the best representation of that old saying, What is one man’s white elephant is another man’s prize. They also have their place in our economy as goods change hands, money is made, and customers leave satisfied. Some folks don’t want to bother with the sale part, but simply donate to charitable institutions like Good Will or Salvation Army. That works too, but somehow the sale on the street seems more exciting and unpredictable. You just have no idea what you will find. This is truly a great recycling adventure that was made in America!

P.S. It's the next day and I noticed that the leftovers from the garage sale across the street were being readied for pick up by a group that will somehow find a use for them. I have lived in this house for seventeen years and just met my neighbor Barb for the first time. It took a garage sale for us to get acquainted! She made some money, had some fun, and pointed out that only a few items had not been sold. Two were tables, and I suggested that she put a sign marked "free" on them and they would probably be snatched up by a passerby. I had just gotten rid of an enormous cat climbing structure that way earlier. But wait, I think I can use that white rolling table with leaves that fold down for our beach place up north. It would be perfect for serving food on the patio yet easy to store. Hmmmm! Maybe with respect to my daughter the fruit doesn't fall far from the tree.

ALL IS NOT FAIR AT THE FAIR!

2011-08-21T23:40:00.000-07:00

The Northwest Washington State Fair in Lynden attracts thousands annually, rain or shine, and this year was no exception. Four of those visitors were my step son, his wife, and two friends from the Tri-Cities. Roger had been looking forward to taking in the fair again for one important reason....the homemade peach and blueberry pie made by the "little church ladies" who sold them there every year. My mouth watered just hearing his description. Imagine my surprise then, when he returned instead with a strawberry-rhubarb and a marion berry pie - made by a pastry company and sold at the fair. The little church ladies small money making booth had been ambushed by the health department.

There is definitely something wrong with this picture, and what is wrong can, in a way, be extrapolated to what is wrong with society's trends today. It boils down to a lack of common sense by those in charge of legislating our lives. I suppose the rationale is that the church lady pies might contain some dastardly food poisoning from which someone somewhere is trying to protect us. Spare me. I will take my chances that those pies will be carefully prepared and free of germs.

The story recently about the kids' lemonade stand being shut down because there was no permit was perhaps worse. It's bad enough that parents can no longer bring homemade cupcakes to school for a child's birthday without reprisal.

These are only a few examples of the actions of well intentioned people in power controlling our lives for our own good. Stop the nonsense. If you don't want to eat pie at the fair, buy lemonade from a kid's sidewalk stand, or eat birthday cupcakes, then don't. Just don't interfere with my rights to such enjoyment. These simple pleasures are a small part of what makes America be America, and we need to rethink our motivation whenever we enact legislation that curtails simple freedoms.

A BEAUTIFUL WEDDING THAT WON'T BREAK THE BANK

2011-08-14T23:34:00.000-07:00

To keep your marriage brimming with love in the loving cup

Whenever you're wrong, admit it: whenever you're right, shut up.
Ogden Nash

A few months ago my daughter asked if we would be willing to have a garden wedding at our Edmonds home for one of her friends. Without hesitation we said “of course”, setting in motion plans for yesterday’s ceremony at 4:00.

We do have a beautiful yard thanks to a love of gardening by my husband’s now deceased stepmother and a team of gardeners who work weekly magic. The partially wooded half acre features northwest flora, ponds in both front and back yards and a wonderful view of Puget Sound. Now add a couple in love, their families and a few close friends, sunshine, good food, drinks, and a live band, and one has a winner for “small wedding of the year.” Guests came from Florida, South Carolina, Arizona, Wisconsin, and California, as well as those who lived locally. Many family members were conscripted into duty on the big day to decorate, set up the bar, and later, to help clean up.

The happy couple, thirty somethings, planned a “do it yourself” wedding with a budget of $5,000. Here was their approximate financial recipe.

$l,300 for a catered buffet and servers
$l,500 for an awesome local band of five
$ 600 champagne, mixed drinks, beer, soft drinks, juices and punch
$ 120 pies
$1,100 dance stage, covered area, tables, chairs, table cloths, dishes, silverware, etc.
$ 200 flowers
$ 100 favors
$ 400 invitation, minister, photography and other miscellaneous expenses

Note: The wedding dress was made by a friend at minimal cost. The veil was designed and made by the bride and my daughter.

Not seeing a three tiered cake? That’s because they decided they liked pie better. Seven different pies, including such favorites as apple, key lime, pecan, strawberry rhubarb, lemon meringue, cherry almond and peach were decorated with wedding photo cutouts of family members , and which listed the various fillings. The "to die for" pies came from High 5 Pie on Capital Hill.

The bride and groom met at the Shake the Shack Rockabilly Ball sponsored by KEXP 90.3 FM's Leon Berman, so they decided on a rockabilly theme. Flowers were red and white roses placed in canning jars. Miniature glass cowboy boots, filled with “red hots”, were table favors along with other tiny cowboy boots filled with bubble solution. Small jars of raspberry jam suggested the users “spread the love.” Red gingham napkins provided additional table color along with candy also wrapped in gingham which was scattered on the table tops.

Guests happily mingled on the terrace awaiting the moment the bride would appear, enjoying each other and the view on this mild northwest day. Two members of the band, one on a steel guitar and the other on an accordion, provided background music composed by them. When a signal was given the minister, groom and “best woman” along with the guests moved to a seating area in front of a pond, and waited for the bridal party to process. The non-traditional music was soft and dreamy as my daughter, the only bridesmaid and dressed in vintage red, appeared. She was followed by a young flower girl scattering rose petals. Finally the bride and her father appeared. She was dressed in a simple off-white gown and small veil, and carried red and white roses.

The ceremony itself was traditional and moving, and when completed, all present were treated to an outstanding buffet, while listening and dancing to Jo Miller and her Burly Roughnecks. It was fitting that one of the largest expenditures was the band. If you click on Jo Miller you will hear a youtube song performed by these musicians called “Let’s talk about love.” This performance will give you a taste of what the wedding guests enjoyed into the evening yesterday. The event was even sweeter because as a finale the band played an intimate acoustic set by candlelight for any remaining guests. Their professionalism and talent made every penny of their expense worthwhile. After hearing the music selection above, and you are interested in booking this band, go to http://www.davekeenan.com.

Basking in the afterglow we told ourselves over and over how wonderful the day and evening had been, and how glad we were to be part of giving such a romantic send off to this newly married young couple. Consider this: They are just as married and have as wonderful a wedding memory at $5,000 as do other couples who have incurred considerable debt. Online articles tell us that the average wedding price tag ranges from $l5,000 to $30,000.

This morning they returned to oversee the rental returns and clean up. I am not sure what the rest of their honeymoon will be like, but they had the look of love today, and I am thinking they will be in it for the long haul. Congratulations and have a wonderful life!

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Planning a wedding yourself? Here are some on-line resources:

To find out the average costs of nearly every aspect of a wedding try this site:
http://www.costofwedding.com/index.cfm/action/search.weddingcost/zipcode/98020/cat/

If you are overwhelmed by the cost of a wedding, check out this site to find ways to reduce the average cost.
http://www.smartmoney.com/spend/family-money/theyll-never-know-eight-hidden-ways-to-cut-wedding-costs-13918/

Want a step-by-step plan for having an affordable wedding? Try these sites:
http://financialplan.about.com/od/planningforlifestages/a/saveonwedding.htm

"How to get dazzling wedding decor on a budget" by David Tutera

http://www.dailyfinance.com/2011/08/06/david-tutera-how-to-get-dazzling-wedding-decor-on-a-budget/

ANACORTES ART FESTIVAL IS FUN, FREE AND FABULOUS

2011-08-07T23:42:00.000-07:00

Looking for something fun to do that's mostly free? Try your local summer street fairs. These fairs and other larger county fairs abound around Northwest Washington, offering a chance to check out the latest designs in ceramics, glass, wood furniture, metal sculpture, yard art, jewelry and more. The list goes on and on, as artisans sell their wares to those of us who happily open our wallets in support of talented entrepreneurs. I am always fascinated to see what new creations are made. Music and sidewalk actors like jugglers and magicians usually add to the fun and pleasure.

For the fourth year in a row, we attended the 50th Annual Anacortes Art Festival to see what was new, eat hot dogs, ears of corn, and squares of curly fries, and listen to the many musicians scattered along Commercial Street, the main drag in town. The unusual item that stood out for me this year was an ordinary one-gallon paint can, decorated with cut out designs and filled with wax. I liked this oversize luminaria, and marveled that someone had the imagination to make it. One of my past festival purchases was a simple wooden sign that adorns our hot tub. "We don't skinny dip. We chunky dunk." I still get a kick out of the saying (and its truth), and will always remember the magical day in Anacortes when I bought it.

As we sauntered along, I realized that this is one of the activities that makes our country special. In spite of our dismal economy we can have fun soaking up the sights, sounds and smells of a street fair, and help to support our fellow citizens in the process. And if you don't have any extra cash, where else can you park, people watch, and listen to good music for free?

Our true destination was the Main Stage where my son and his buddy were in charge of the sound system for the headliner groups scheduled to perform. Today the Mach One Jazz Orchestra at 12:00, followed by the Mark Dufresne Band, featuring blues, vocals and harmonica. The afternoon would end with Bump Kitchen R & B funk and soul music. All music groups on the Main Stage have to be approved by a festival committee, and as a result, they are all worth hearing. But Mach One, with its big band swing music was the one we were most eager to hear, and it didn't disappoint. Couples caught up in the rhythm and beat danced in front of the stage, while the rest of us less extroverted folks in the audience smiled, nodded our heads and tapped our feet in time to the music.  

Although the crowd was mostly over fifty, several kids stood out. They were swing dancing their hearts out and looked like they could be on a junior version of Dancing With the Stars. Later I learned that the boy was seventeen, and one of his partners was his 13-year old sister. They belong to a swing dance group in a Seattle suburb, and just love dancing, taking advantage of every opportunity to perfect their skills. I enjoyed watching them later on the sidelines as the boy was patiently showing his little sister some of the more complicated moves. I doubt that their parents are overly worried about some of the pitfalls kids face these days. These young people are expending their excess energy on really wholesome fun! Seeing their love of the big band music and their zest in dancing I decided to tell my grandchildren about it. You can too. Check out Seattle Swing Dancers, a club that provides lessons for all ages starting at l3 years old. Maybe I'll take lessons myself. If you aren't lucky enough to live in the Seattle area, look for similar clubs near you.

Although the Anacortes Festival is now just a memory, there is still time to catch a fair in your area. Click on the following site and find one near you that will give you an emotional boost, AND help the vendors make their ends meet. While you're at it, check your local calendar for Saturday markets. Add locally grown fruits and vegetables to booths filled with trinkets and treasures, and you have a recipe for a fun filled day. It's a win-win experience. http://www.northwestcharm.com/wa/subjects/fairs.htm

WEBOPEDIA AND NETLINGO HELP US TO UNDERSTAND THE 21st CENTURY

2011-07-31T16:44:00.000-07:00

“Technobabble: technical jargon incomprehensible to non-specialists; -- sometimes used derogatorily of discussions using unnecessarily technical terminology and intended to impress or confuse, rather than inform, the listener.” From Question.com.

My husband announced today that he will be attending a webinar on Thursday. “Webinar,” I exclained! “What is it and where?” “You don’t GO anywhere”, he patiently informed me. “It’s on the web and you simply log on and learn.” This explanation came on the heels of a TV commercial I had just seen, where a 5 year old boy was holding a flash drive in his hand, letting everyone know that THIS particular gizmo was just what he needed for school. I think it was actually on his school supply list. Wow! I thought to myself. This is big. It’s a whole new way of communicating and I am falling seriously behind. Thinking it might be a neat topic for my blog, I asked my hubby to give me ten unsual blogosphere vocabulary words that I could pass on to my readers. He looked at me blankly, then brightened. “Just log on to the internet. You’ll find out what you’re looking for.” So I did, and here are a few interesting bits of modern “techno speak.”

For starters, forget encyclopedias, my old tried and true method of getting information. Now it’s the webopedia that you want. I typed in “latest technology terminology” on the Google search bar, and up popped page after page of entries from which to choose. I didn’t get past the first page, as my eyes latched first onto “NetLingo – The Internet Dictionary” and then on “Webopedia: Online Computer Dictionary.”

I casually perused a few entries and realized that a different languge is now being used. For example, in the not so olden days, I believe “social scoring” might have referred to some guy hitting on a girl at a party. Not today. According to one on-line definition, social scoring, a.k.a. your social score, is “the act of rating a person’s level of influence based on evaluating one’s followers, friends and postings on social networks like Twitter and Facebook.”

Next I checked out NetLingo. What a fascinating site, but way TMI to go into here. I have decided to share a few examples, then encourage you to expand your technological horizons by clicking on the sites I have listed.

Feeling in the need of a bit of humor after the constant barrage of depressing congressional budget haranguing, I found several lists writen by Erin Janson, writer, publisher and contributing editor for newspapers, television and online articles. Her top 50 funniest terms used in the online world. http://www.netlingo.com/top50/funniest-terms.php was just what I needed Here are ten you might enjoy.

1. “Assicons” - a funny take on emoticons. Boobiecons, like assicons, involve another body part.

2. “Cluster funk” - when a multitude of things go wrong on a computer system.

3. “Corneo gumbo” – a visually noisy or over-designed web site, usually with too many graphics.

4. “Double geeking” - when you use two computers at the same time. “Triple geeking is using three computers.

5. “Fram” - spam sent to you by your friends or family

6. “Grok” - to “get it” or understand something so that you absorb it.

7. “Open your kimono” - Silicon Valley slang for revealing your business idea to someone after he or she signs an NDA.

8. “Seagull manager” - a manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps over everything, and then leaves.

9. “Word of mouse” - gossip or information spread via the net, usually through e-mail, blogs or newsgroup postings.

10. “Shareware girl” - office jargon for the coolest girl in the company.

For those who feel hopelessly out of touch with your kids, she has 50 acronyms every parent needs to know. Here are another ten examples:

1. CD9 - Code 9 - it means parents are around

2. P911 - Parent Alert

3. NIFOC - Nude In Front Of The Computer

4. KPC - Keeping Parents Clueless

5. TDTM - Talk Dirty To Me

6. PIR - Parent In Room

7. POS - Parent Over Shoulder -or- Piece Of Sh**

8. RUH - Are You Horny?

9. 420 - Marijuana

10. ASL - Age/Sex/Location

Other top 50 lists include, Top 50 Popular Text & Chat Acronyms , Top 50 Popular Text Terms Used in Business , Top 50 Newbie Terms Everyone Needs to Know , and Top 50 Tech Terms that are Now Common Expressions

For many of my generation, all of these lists exemplify a form of technobabble. A kind of blah, blah, blah that no one can or wants to understand. I, on the other hand, find changes in the way we communicate, updating the dictionary, and learning new information as an important way to keep relevant in this increasingly complex world. With this philosophy I’ll try to keep you abreast of future trends and bits of interesting trivia. I want to be seen as “with it” when I show show a 20 something year-old that I know full well that discussing velveeta is not referring to cheese! Have I piqued your curiosity? Go check one of the Top 50 lists to become informed.

BUILDING A SUCCESSFUL WORLD COMMUNITY FAMIILY BY FAMILY

2011-07-24T23:38:00.000-07:00

To put the world right in order, we must first put the nation in order; to put the nation in
order, we must first put the family in order; to put the family in order, we must first cultivate
our personal life; we must first set our hearts right." Author unknown

We had a family gathering two weeks ago, drawing together relatives who had not seen each other for months or even years. The drawing card was meeting nine Swedish relatives most of us had never seen before, and giving them a warm welcome. We did that in spades, and I think we all felt the richer for our efforts.

The internet made it possible to track down and send a general invitation to all family members who had e-mail and were able to attend one or more events. We are talking about nearly seventy people! They all learned about several planned gatherings--a July 4 beach picnic with fireworks, an elegant dinner buffet, and several continental breakfasts in Whatcom County, followed by the usual sightseeing, a typical urban style outdoor dinner and a lot of shopping in Seattle. Also in the plan was the Duck Tour a visit to Pike Place Market and time spent absorbing the sights and sounds of downtown.

I should mention here that ours is a complex, multi-faceted family which has seen its share of marriage, divorce, remarriages, blends of all kinds, and a fair amount of personal drama. It became clear through various conversations that the same could be said for our Swedish guests.

The visit produced a few interesting results. On our side, some old wounds were healed, some opinions were changed, and some real communication took place. Beyond that we were exposed to another culture by well informed, well educated, typical Swedes who spoke excellent English. This made it possible to fully understand each other. On their side they were amazed at the warmth and caring by Americans in general from New York City where they began their vacation, to the Pacific Northwest. They were particularly enthralled with Winthrop, a cowboy-like western town on the North Cascades Highway. On that side trip they also went to Leavenworth which most of us enjoy because it makes us feel like we're in Switzerland. Since they had been to the real Switzerland I think they looked at Leavenworth as a tourist heaven.

One late evening we enjoyed a conversation about our political systems which highlighted our countries' mutual concerns. I had always had the perception that Swedes in general were very happy with their social democracy, and that although their taxes were high in order to have free medical care and free higher education, they believed in resulting benefits. These folks were worried about the direction their government was going, the quality of their schools and their immigrations problems, with "foreigners" taking jobs from Swedes, etc. It sounded familiar. As a teacher, one bit of information interested me. Children with special needs were not served as well in the public schools are are ours. These children often found educational homes in schools like Montessori.

Their English speaking ability was phenomenal, from the 13 year old twins and their 16 year old brother, to the two older girls, ages 22 and 27, and their parents. This is not uncommon in Sweden. I am a little jealous that they learn more than one language at school from a young age.

I think we Americans could take a lesson in civility and courtesy from our northern friends across the ocean. They came bearing wonderful gifts for several family members who would be entertaining them. We received beautiful Swedish crystal and wall hangings. Unusual food appeared out of suitcases to tempt our palates - tasty cheeses, herring, caviar and those wonderful large round crackers called knakkebrod. Constant offers of help and expressions of appreciation were made. Although at one point all nine were at our small beach cabin and at the one next door, their polite and unobtrusive presence made the time enjoyable.

We waved goodbye eleven days after they arrived, as they headed for the airport and the last two legs of their journey - first Los Angeles and then San Francisco. It was a bittersweet moment, because even though promises were made to get together again soon, experience tells us that travel and economics make frequent visits impossible. The wonderful technological gift of skyping will, however, allow for virtual visits.

I did not want to let go of the excitement from all of our get-togethers, and the chance to really get to know many relatives I saw only occasionally. I polled a few people in the family to see what they thought about having a monthly or quarterly newsletter about our family to keep this new closeness alive. Everyone I talked to thought it was a great idea. I was most impressed by the answer of my niece who has had a challenging but successful life. Against great odds she has raised twins as a single parent, and is now going for her master's degree in communication. She thought a newsletter keeping us all informed and allowing us all to be "reporters" of our news was a good idea. Having studied law, societies and justice as an undergrad, she believes in the importance of communities. Really, by getting to know each other better, and accepting our various lifestyles and belief systems, we are building community in our family. Her view is that if we can't have successful relationships within our family, how can we expect to have them in the world at large. It's a great point. Robert M. Hutchins said "A world community can only exist with world communication, which means something more than extensive software facilities scattered about the globe. It means common understanding, a common tradition, common ideas and common ideals." Surely that's a goal within our grasp.

ON A RAINY DAY, LOOK FOR A SILVER LINING

2011-07-17T23:43:00.000-07:00

"And when it rains on your parade, look up rather than down. Without the rain, there would be no rainbow." Gilbert Chesterson"

It rained today....again! I mean, really, haven't we had enough? I have been trying to keep a positive attitude about our weather, to look for a silver lining, but today I went over the edge. It is July 17, traditionally the best time of the year in the northwest, and it feels like winter. Just to be sure, I decided find out if it had really been gray and wet, or if it just seemed like it. I went to a site that gives monthly weather summaries, and Yup! It's been gray and wet.

In April there was one sunny day with sixteen rainy and the remainder cloudy days. In May there were three sunny days, with the remainder cloudy and rainy. This month we have had four sunny days with the rest cloudy and wet. This is what http://www.beautifulseattle.com/ says about our weather:

"No, it does not rain all the time in Seattle. Many large cities on the USA east coast (i.e., Atlanta, New York, Washington D.C.) receive more annual precipitation than Seattle. However, when it stops raining in these east coast cities, the sky clears. In Seattle, when it stops raining, the sky stays overcast. The rain in Seattle is usually a light or fine misty rain. The normal average annual precipitation total for Seattle is 37.07 inches."

Sadly, there is nothing to do but grin and bear it, then count our blessings. We are not in a two year drought like Somalia. We do not have raging forest fires like the recent one in Arizona. We can have beach fires and fireplace fires without worrying about a burn ban. We have not suffered devastating, destructive tornadoes like those in the south. We are not baking like the midwest and the northeast. And most important of all, we still have our spectacular scenery, snow capped mountains, rivers and waterfalls, parks abundant with flora and fauna, and prolific flower and vegetable gardens.

I need an attitude change, and writing this blog is helping to bring one about. Since we can't do anything about changing the weather except to move elsewhere, here is some lemonade from our weather's lemons.

1. Grab an umbrella (no need for sun screen) and go for a walk in the rain.

2. Smell the pure air and be glad that you don't need to stay inside with a noisy, irritating air conditioner running.

3. Make a fire in the fireplace and curl up with a good book

4. Check out the latest movies and choose one that will make you laugh.

5. Go to a restaurant with a view and have a glass of wine and an appetizer. Anthony's Hearthfire in Bellingham, Washington is a favorite. An outdoor waterfall presided over by a fiery torch predicts the magic inside, where one's eyes take in a decor featuring blown glass, warm colors and the view outside. If you are on a budget, or if coffee is your drink of choice, try Wood's Coffee. This delightful coffee shop is perched on the edge of Bellingham Bay in Boulevard Park. It has an unobstructed view of the water, and an outdoor seating area for when the sun finally pops out.

6. If you're lucky enough to have a hot tub, sit in it with the rain coming down. It's fun.

7. Get some friends to come over for an afternoon of cards or games.

8. Bake a cake or pie and take it to someone who would be surprised and overjoyed to see you. (My sister came over today with a friend and brought a Papa Murphy's Take and Bake Pizza. It was unexpected, delicious, and made my day.

9. Find an activity in your area, and participate in it, despite the rain. For me it was the Birch Bay Parade, where my sister was the Grand Marshall. I never personally knew a Grand Marshall before and it was fun to see her listed as such in the lead car as she waved to those of us watching, umbrellas held high.

10. Try making something old-fashioned and tasty, like homemade fudge. Click on this Hershey fudge recipe which my husband swears by, and about which everyone who tastes it raves. If chocolate can't chase the blues away, what can?

Finally, to really think positive, look for a rainbow or a cloud with a silver lining. I saw one briefly today, and it must surely be a sign of better weather tomorrow. At least, with my new attitude adjustment I am thinking positive. You should too. It really works.

FAMILY OUTINGS CAN BE "VALUE ADDED" EXPERIENCES

2011-07-10T23:20:00.000-07:00

In recent years we have been hearing the phrase “value added” when referring to how well a student, teacher or school is performing. The Analytic Quality Glossary on line defines it this way: “Value-added refers to the enhancement of the knowledge, skills and abilities of students and the empowering of them as critical, reflective, life-long learners." With respect to teachers, an on-line article by Marc Holley says “The central premise of "value-added assessment" is that it is possible to measure the contributions that a teacher makes to a student’s academic achievement gains.

It is my opinion that the term should also apply to parents and what value they are adding to their children’s overall education, assisting them to become “reflective life-long learners.”

My family is in the midst of an extended visit by two Swedish families – relatives of mine – who started in New York City, are presently here, and will be concluding their three week trip with visits to the San Francisco and Los Angeles areas. We had a first hand look at value being added to the lives of the Swedish young people involved – 13 year old twins, a 16 year old boy, and two adult children, ages 22 and 27. During the visit so far, they have experienced family life on Long Island, a fourth of July parade, fireworks on an Indian reservation with all its splendor and excitement, bonfires, s’more making, several picnics as American as apple pie, and interactions with more than fifty relatives, all of us having grandfathers/mothers or great grandfathers/mothers in our common ancestry.

Today, before going downtown for a Seattle Duck Tour, several of us went to Fred Meyer and Value Village for another taste of typical America, and a few tourist dollars were dropped along the way. I have been impressed with and proud of my relatives – their interest in all they see, their respectful and polite manner, their enjoyment of each other, and their amazing ability with the English language.

It’s my feeling they represent many European families who travel extensively and understand the value of such experiences. Granted it is easier to do if you live in Europe. Our country is so large and it costs so much to travel any distance, that many of us do not see the opportunities in front of our noses.

We may not easily go to Europe, Japan or China, but we can take advantage of small weekend adventures that bring the world to us. For example, this weekend in Seattle we could visit our international district, and participate in the dragon festival with its great Asian foods, entertainment and music. In Ballard a street fair gave everyone a taste of Scandinavia, with various ethnic foods, music and entertainment. A little further north the Edmonds Art Festival, one of the Pacific Northwest’s oldest festivals, delighted adults and children alike with everything from painting and photography to art glass, yard art, homemade toys, activities and food booths. Later in the summer there will be a Tibetan festival, a Greek festival and, of course, Bumbershoot.

Many of these offerings are free or minimal in cost, and those parents who are availing themselves of these various cultural and entertainment activities are adding immensely to the lives of their children, their fond childhood memories and the bond that takes place when families play together.

So check out the event section of the paper or go to internet sites like http://www.seattle-downtown.com/events/ . Pull your kids away from their Game Boys, X-Boxes, and other video games and introduce them to the world in our backyard. This is a great way for parents to add value to their children’s education, empowering them and helping them to become lifelong learners.

AMENDING OUR THINKING ON THE FOURTH OF JULY

2011-07-03T21:05:00.000-07:00

On July 4, 2010 I wrote a poem called, "Happy Birthday USA, the Fourth of July is your day." I liked what I wrote and you can check it out if you are interested in my patriotic poem. In the meantime a year has passed with all our country's ups and downs, and I find myself wondering where we are going, what will happen, and whether I should be optimistic or afraid for the future?

One thing I do know is that some people become so passionate about our country and where it is headed that civility goes out the window. Each side argues loudly and vehemently, and we see poor behavior modeled for us on talk shows and in congress itself. One side thinks we are " going to hell in a hand basket," and our forefathers would be " rolling in their graves" if they could see what has happened to the intent of the constitution. Another side says our country and life today is now so dramatically different that modern problems could not have been imagined or addressed in the 18th century. What would the founding fathers say? Surf the internet and you can find an opinion to match every position.

One person I know is so bonded to the original constitution that he nearly froths at the mouth when hearing about it being called a living document. In simple terms he feels that people should go live in one of the countries that have welfare-like states if that's what they want. Another might say in return, hey, if you don't like all the benefits gained by higher taxes, and the security provided by laws and rules, you go to a third world country where there are no taxes, roads, mail, internet, or schools, and see how you like it. It's unwinnable, because we have so many different people with as many differing viewpoints. Without common ground there can be no understanding.

I guess the words "common ground" are key here. Our common ground should be a love and appreciation of our country and a caring for each other. Recognizing that our constitution, whether one believes in a living or traditional view of it, is the oldest written constitution still in use is truly amazing. If you research what life was like then as they attempted to wrestle with the problems of the day, you might have an "aha" moment, thinking it sounds like what's going on in the USA today. Below is a snippet from Wikipedia you might find informative and enlightening.

"Congress could print money, but by 1786, it was useless. It could borrow money, but it could not pay it back.^[8] Under the Articles, Congress requisitioned money from the states. But no state paid all of their requisition; Georgia paid nothing. A few states paid the US an amount equal to interest on the national debt owed to their citizens, but no more.^[8] Nothing was paid toward the interest on debt owed foreign governments. By 1786, the United States was about to default on its contractual obligations when the principal came due.^[9]

Most of the US troops in the 625-man US Army were deployed facing British forts on American soil. They had not been paid; they were deserting and the remainder threatened mutiny.^[10] Spain closed New Orleans to American commerce. The US protested to no effect. The Barbary Pirates began seizing American commercial ships. The US had no funds to pay their extortion demands.^[11] States such as New York and South Carolina violated the peace treaty with Britain by prosecuting Loyalists for wartime activity. The US had no more credit if another military crisis required action.^[11] In Massachusetts during Shays' Rebellion, Congress had no money; General Benjamin Lincoln had to raise funds among Boston merchants to pay for a volunteer army.^[12]

Congress was paralyzed. It could do nothing significant without nine states, and some legislative business required all thirteen. By April 1786, there had been only three days out of five months with nine states present. When nine states did show up, if there were only one member of a state on the floor, that state’s vote did not count. If a delegation were evenly divided, the division was duly noted in the Journal, but there was no vote from that state towards a nine-count.^[13] States, in violation of the Articles, laid embargoes, negotiated unilaterally abroad, provided for armies and made war. ^[14] The Articles Congress had “virtually ceased trying to govern."”^[15]

For people who like to argue about a living versus traditional constitution, click on this article from helium.com to get opposing views.

It seems that the founding fathers had a great deal of wisdom, but no crystal ball. They did the best they could and their work has stood the test of time. Realizing that there might be changes needed, they made room for those changes through the amendment process. Since its inception there have been the first ten amendments which comprise the Bill of Rights followed by twenty seven other ratified amendments plus some which are not ratified. Certainly, from a feminine point of view, the amendment which made it possible for women to vote, was huge.

Our forefathers would be filled with "shock and awe" at our life today, but probably wouldn't have solutions. Our job is to make the best decisions we can with society's complex problems, and treat our constitution with respect. Freedom is a fragile thing, and I think those who would destroy us cheer our divisive and sometime destructive behaviors. Let's understand that our unparalled freedom is fragile, and not cast in stone. Let's guard it zealously, accepting our differences and making life better for all our citizens, even if we have to make amendments to our own positions and viewpoints.

MY FATHER DRANK HIS COFFEE FROM A CHINA CUP

2011-06-19T23:44:00.000-07:00

Father's Day is a time for honoring those fathers who are with us and remembering those who have passed on. My dad died in 1990 at the age of 90, and he taught me many important lessons.

Although born in Chicago, and a true city slicker, he pioneered his way with my mother to Lynden, Washington and raised a family of seven by holding down two jobs. From my earliest memory he was both a farmer and a state highway department employee. I remember feeling sorry for how hard he worked, and seeds of the importance of having empathy towards others were sown in my heart.

Although he had been up since 5:00 a.m. to milk cows, I woke up at 7:00 a.m. to the sound of "Cowboy Capers" on the radio and the aroma of frying bacon and percolated coffee emanating from the adjacent kitchen. His breakfast always consisted of eggs, bacon, cereal, toast, and coffee which he drank from a china cup. Cholesterol was as yet an unknown word. My mother hovered nearby to take care of his every need, but conversation was limited. In thinking back, they were probably both dog-tired at the start of their day. He then headed off to his highway department job, only to return home at 5:00 p.m. for dinner, cow milking, plowing, working the land, or whatever else was necessary to keep bread on the table. Certainly the old days in Chicago must have been a source of nostalgia as they plodded through their daily lives.

As soon as I was able, probably around seven or eight years of age, I brought the cows to the barn, learned how to milk them, and did an increasing amount of other farm related work, feeling happy to help out. Without realizing it, my father was giving me a gift - a lifelong work ethic that has served me in good stead.

My mother contributed by telling me to go out to the barn and help my father, rather than to help her in the kitchen. As a result, cooking was not my forte, but I could handle anything in the barn, drive a tractor like a pro, take care of chickens, plant and care for crops, bring in the hay, help dynamite stumps, put out peat fires, mow lawns, pick strawberries and beans in neighboring fields to earn money for school, and more. By today's standards it seems like a lot of work, but at the time, and in hindsight, it was both rewarding and fun. It was the way life was for most of us farm children.

My dad had high expectations for himself and for his children, six girls and one boy. One of those expectations was getting a good education although he personally had to leave school at ninth grade. His education came from the school of hard knocks and reading when he had time. To his immense gratification his children did well in school. When the first daughters graduated as valedictorians or salutatorians, he put pressure on those remaining to do the same. Five of six brought that honor home, while our brother left school early to serve as a marine during WWII.

A member of the local Grange, he was grange master more than once, and during his watch I observed him taking care of grange business, promoting exciting social activities and participating in the local fair. During his time as master the gavel was stored in a kitchen cupboard, and my younger sister and I played with it often. Understanding its power in the grown up world, our imaginary scenarios provided us with lessons in leadership

A sense of family pride was instilled by constant reminders of our family name, and that we were "a cut above everyone else." This belief kept my feet on a straight and narrow path. A Fjellman girl would not fail her classes, sneak out at night, be disrespectful, lie or steal. Many years later, as a single parent of three, a Fjellman girl would not go on welfare, but simply take on two or more jobs to survive.

Generosity was part of life, as our door was open to others, whether for a day or a month. The coffee pot was always on and the house was warm and welcoming. Although I guess we were poor, we always had plenty to eat and dressed nicely thanks to my mom's sewing skill on an old treadle Singer, and bargain shopping. But her story can be told another time.

A powerful memory, and one that makes us all smile, was the china cup I alluded to earlier. My father would only drink coffee from his favorite china cup. This affectation lasted until his dying day, and probably held a clue to how he viewed life. No matter what hardships or disappointments he may have endured, the china cup was a symbol of his success and self importance. He was not a warm and fuzzy dad, and he kept tight control over the family, but we all grew up to be responsible, proud, generous, hard working, well educated, leaders and decision makers in our various jobs and communities.

Way to go, Dad. Thank you and happy Father's Day wherever you may be.

TEN TIPS ON HOW TO BE AN "A" STUDENT

2011-06-12T12:28:00.000-07:00

"College is like a fountain of knowledge - and the students are there to drink” anonymous

Back in college after fifty years - what an eye opener! Two months ago, on April 10 to be exact, I shared with you my first impressions about returning to college where I was taking ten credits of Spanish and piano. Why go? I did this because I'd procrastinated in renewing my teaching credential and needed fifteen credits by early next year. I decided to bite the bullet and get them out of the way as quickly as possible - thus I became an Edmonds Community College daytime student.

Much has changed since 1959, especially regarding technology, but one thing remains constant: Student behavior and study habits. As it was then, it is now. Grade books will tells us that a small percentage of students will get A, more will get B, most will get C, and going down the curve, fewer will get D or F.

I think I am heading for an "A " in Spanish. My classmate, Cathleen, is doing likewise. We had some thoughts as to why:

1. The Big One: If the teacher tells you to do something a certain way, DO IT!!! It matters not if you think you have a better or easier way. If he or she gives you a sample or model to follow, do so.

2. Take complete notes. BE SURE YOU CAN READ YOUR OWN HANDWRITING. If necessary, bring a tape recorder and tape the lecture. This is particularly helpful if you can't write as fast as the instructor speaks.

3. Participate in the classroom by raising your hand and contributing. It shows you are listening.

4. Do not be afraid to ask questions. This also shows you are listening.

5. Attend on a regular basis. If you must be absent, inform the teacher ahead of time verbally or by e-mail and find someone in the class to take notes for you.

6. Study as you go. Forget cramming. It is neither useful nor helpful in the long term. We had so much thrown at us in Spanish that, by necessity I had to cram. I have to go back and re-learn a lot if I want Spanish to be useful to me.

7. If the instructor offers you optional extra credit opportunities to add to your grade, do not "blow them off" but take advantage of this gift. In our case we would get 15 points for engaging in three cultural opportunities followed by brief written reports: (a) Eating in a bona fide Mexican, Central American, Caribbean or Spanish restaurant , (b) watching a Spanish speaking movie (with English subtitles), and (c) attending one multicultural event.

· Our family dined at the Buenos Aires restaurant in downtown Seattle.

· I attended the Cinco De Mayo celebration on campus.

· I saw the Spanish movie "Volver" with Penelope Cruz, also on campus, in the Black Box Theater.

Not only did I get 15 points towards my grade, I learned a lot and had a great time doing it. I would have done none of those things without the strong suggestion of the teacher. I might add here, though, that his strong suggestion made "optional" feel like "mandatory" .

8. Do NOT cheat. If the teacher doesn't notice it, you can be sure your classmates will. Someone is sure to "narc" on you to your extreme detriment.

9. DO NOT FALL ASLEEP IN CLASS. If a father of three, who has worked a graveyard shift can come to class, participate, take notes, and look alive, then certainly a younger student whose only excuse is too much partying, TV or gaming can do the same.

10. Study a little every day, do all work, hand it in on time, and be accountable. You will get your A.

To put it all in perspective, remember why you are in school. If your parents are paying for your education you can show respect by doing your best while you try to figure what you want to do with your life. If you are paying for your education, it stands to reason that you will want to do well. We often value more that which we pay for, whether a toy, car, house or our education.

Remember also that how you do in each class has a cumulative effect on your transcript, and how easy or difficult it will be to transfer to a school with stringent entry requirements. A couple of students in my class want to go to the U.W. nursing school. Grades matter and you won't get in without good ones.

Don't just take up space because you can't think of anything else to do. It's not really fair to those who want entry, but can't get in because classes are full. That happened in our class. Several were on the waiting list, but the deadline passed and by then it was too late. In the meantime, several students dropped out because it got too hard. Too bad they weren't motivated to keep going, and didn't have the study habits to make it happen.

Cathleen and I spent a few minutes thinking about our mutual work ethic and why getting an "A" in class was important to us. It undoubtedly has to do with the way we were raised and the experiences we had that drive our desire to do well. But we both agreed on this: Anyone can do well in class if they follow a few simple guidelines. Try it. You might like the results.

FLIP-FLOPPING - IS IT O.K. TO CHANGE YOUR MIND?

2011-06-05T23:00:00.000-07:00

If you never change your mind, why have one? By Edward De Bono

My husband and I were watching Piers Morgan as he interviewed Jerry Springer the other night. The jury’s still out on Piers, but both of us stood in agreement about Jerry Springer. We saw him on TV in a London airport l5 years ago, and were embarrassed by a show that displayed what seemed like the lowest common denominator of human interaction in America.

Imagine our surprise, then, as we heard an intelligent, well spoken individual discussing his views on a variety of today’s topics with sensitivity, and insight. This could not be the same man we saw in London, who seemed to whip his guests into a frenzy of bad behavior, even to the point of physical fighting, much to the audience’s amusement, amazement and entertainment, could it?

We changed our mind about Jerry Springer. Actually our opinion about Piers was also evolving in a positive direction.

This was a “flip flop” for us, and I found myself thinking about the whole notion of flip-flops, especially those that pertain to politics. Specifically, President Obama, and how opponents accuse him of this flip or that flop.

The notion of flip flopping in politics is a negative one, and dates back to 1851 when an article in the New York Times archives cited the “earliest unequivocal mention of ‘flip flop’ as a change in someone’s opinion,”, and in this case, had to do with John W. Goff, a candidate for District Attorney at that time. As time went by, the term was frequently used in political races. In the 2004 US presidential campaign, for example, John Kerry, was accused of flip flopping on several issues to his detriment. Other countries have similar terminology – the UK calls it a U-turn, while Australia and New Zealand call it backflipping.

Whatever the case, to me it seems unfortunate that a political candidate, or anyone for that matter, can’t change their minds on issues, opinions or beliefs without being called to task for the change, and the decidedly negative connotation that flip flopping now implies.

I personally like the idea of being able to change my mind as I gain more information, without some kind of accusation. That ability is what contributes to growing in maturity, and wisdom. I love that my husband and I can sit watching a program on TV, turn to each other, and say, “Wow, that Springer guy has a lot on the ball.” I love that we are not so stuck in our positions that we can’t grow and change, and see things differently. On every level it is important that we all be able to change views without embarrassment or rancor. It’s what brought about the election of Barack Obama, for goodness sake. A lot of people changed their minds about the ability of an African American to hold our nation’s highest office. The possibilities for future enlightenment are exciting to ponder.

So listen with an appreciative ear, and watch with an appreciative eye, as you question your previously held beliefs and do some flip flopping of your own. It doesn’t have to be a negative experience.

CELEBRATIONS ARE IMPORTANT, BUT WHY?

2011-05-29T21:51:00.000-07:00

Celebrate the little things in life, appreciate tomorrow, love your neighbor or don’t, but never condemn yourself to a life without cause to celebrate and be thankful for what you have. Never forget the people you love and love them when you have an occasion to do so. Celebrate their lives and celebrate yours. Anonymous.

The years seem to go by in a blur of annual celebrations; starting with New Year's Day, followed by Valentine's Day, Easter, Memorial Day, Mother's Day, Father's Day, July 4, Labor Day, Thanksgiving, Christmas, and ending with New Year's Eve. Aside from the possible important perk of a day off from work, what other purpose or benefits are there?

My last blog was about Mother's Day. Since then I have been "celebrating" almost every week: A high school graduation in Alaska, a scholarship banquet in Seattle, and tomorrow, Memorial Day in Bellingham. There has been no time to write about my thoughts, feelings and opinions about each, thus I am combining them, all important in their way, in today's topic about why celebrations are important.

(1) Having attended multiple high school graduations of children and grandchildren in Washington state I was wondering if there would be a difference from one in Alaska. We flew to Anchorage on Wednesday, May 11, were met at the airport by our son, and whisked away to the family home in Chugiak, a small nearby town. The graduation was to be at 7:00, and there was the usual hustle-bustle and near calamities (forgotten hat, lost tassel), with several cars heading back to Anchorage and its large arena, site of most area graduations.

Compared to others I have attended, this graduation was conventional and rather sedate - no wild decorating of caps or crazy behavior. Pomp and Circumstance signaled the filing in of graduates, who took their seats in anticipation of this long awaited event. Family members strained to catch a glimpse of their loved ones.

Various student speakers spoke earnestly about what they had learned and what to do about the future, the chosen faculty speaker spoke as earnestly about lessons to be learned and related his speech to his subject of chemistry. Tassels were turned, hundreds of balloons were released, floating downwards, pictures were taken, the honorees were presented with flowers, floral and candy leis, and Voila! It was over. All that was left was the all-night party, a final social symbol of high school's completion. Although they might not have realized it at the time, it was a last goodbye to classmates of many years. Life had changed for hundreds of Chugiak graduated seniors, AND for our granddaughter who will head to Seton Hall in August for a full-ride scholarship to study diplomacy. There was much to celebrate.

(2) A week later found us in the social hall of Mount Zion Baptist Church celebrating a different kind of academic milestone - honoring nine Seattle area high school seniors who were each receiving $l,000 scholarships to attend the post secondary institution of their choice. One hundred-eighty people sat watching, after a banquet dinner, as the nine filed up to receive their certificates and applause. It was a great sendoff to the next step o life.

(3) Memorial Day, tomorrow, is a somber celebration - a day of remembrance of those who died in service to our country. Officially proclaimed a holiday on May 5, 1868, and also called Decoration Day, it was a time when flowers were placed on the graves of union and confederate soldiers in the Arlington National Cemetery. A poem called "In Flanders Fields" by Moina Michael was written in 1914.

We cherish too the poppy red that grows on fields where valor led. It seems to signal to the skies that blood of heroes never dies.

As a result of this poem the poppy became a symbol honoring those who died during time of war. Poppies were sold to benefit servicemen in need, and later to raise money for children orphaned by war, or widowed women.

The holiday has undergone transformation since its inception so that now people remember anyone close to them who has died, decorating graves of loved ones with flowers as well as placing flags on graves and along city streets.

Three different events, three kinds of celebrations. What is their importance? In an informal poll of college classmates and colleagues, friends and family I got these answers.

Celebrations. . .

· Bring people together, and promote camaraderie.
· Keep traditions going
· Recognize work, goals, or milestones
· Recognize the value of life
· Uplift the human spirit in a sometimes gloomy world
· Help us to learn about other cultures, i.e. Cinco de Mayo

These cultural rites help give meaning to life and recognize each and every one of us , whether it is a simple family birthday in a ghetto home with only a cupcake and candle, or a lavish bar mitzvah with hundreds of invited guests who recognize the coming of age of a twelve-year old Jewish boy .

In an impossibly fast paced world celebrations help us to spend a little time taking stock of who we are, and recognizing our value to each other and to our world. Of all the reasons for celebrations listed, perhaps uplifting the human spirit is most important in a world filled with bad news. So, tomorrow enjoy a family picnic after remembering someone who has gone on. Then celebrate every milestone reached, throughout the year, no matter how small. The smiles of joy and laughter in these moments of shared delight will be worth the effort.

A MOTHER ON MOTHERHOOD

2011-05-08T13:58:00.000-07:00

"A mother's love is patient and forgiving when all others are forsaking, it never fails or falters, even though the heart is breaking." Helen Rice

May, 2011 - What a month! As I sat down to write my post last Sunday the unexpected and shocking news about Osama Bin Laden's death was capturing America's attention, including my own. I was rivited to the television set and couldn't concentrate on writing.

So far we have had May Day, (which was to have been last week's topic), Mayhem in the Middle East, and now Mother's Day, with Memorial Day only a few weeks away. All those "M"s and their corresponding meanings could make an interesting modern day rap. Ha! Another "M". The rap might go like this:

May flowers and the May pole were good old fashioned joys, so gentle and so pretty for all the girls and boys. What happened to traditions, those long forgotten days, when simple times brought joy supreme into those days of gray?

We'd put flowers on the doorstep, then quickly knock and hide, to see the door swing open, suprised faces just inside. It was often someone's mother - a neighbor's or your own, when mothers ruled the hearth and home, and bad guys were unknown.

The middle east was far away and touched us not at all - Osama and his vengeful gang outside our nation's wall. Our mothers were our bulwarks, against the world's foes. Sure to feed, comfort and protect us from our worries and our woes.

Through the good times and the bad times we could always count on mother, her loving care and sacrifice unmatched by any other. And when, through death or social change, a mother was replaced, it meant a grandma or an aunt assumed a mother's face.

So take some time to think about a woman in your life, who put aside her needs and wants to lessen your own strife. A call or card would make her day, of that you can be sure. It's a simple way to do some good, that will mean a lot to her.

Happy Mother's Day to all the women who have played a mother's role!

Educational Note: The Origins of Mother's Day. According to an on-line article on the origins of this special day, some form of expressing the importance of mothers has been celebrated since prehistoric times. Mother-oriented festivals were usually held in the spring, and honored mothers of that time. In our country the first real celebration was on May 10, 1908 at Andrew's Methodist Church in Grafton, West Virginia. Julia Ward Howe, authoress of the words to the Battle Hymn of the Republic first suggested the idea, with Anna Jarvis, carrying on the campaign to make it a holiday. In 1914 President Woodrow Wilson declared the second Sunday in May as a national holiday. Click on the article entitled Origins of Mother's Day above for a more complete history of how Mother's Day came to be.

EASTER PARADE AROUND THE WORLD

2011-04-24T10:30:00.000-07:00

"What shall I wear for the Easter Parade?

A dress that’s the color of marmalade 

With a border embroidered in light blue cornflowers

Like the edge of a meadow after spring shower 

And a matching hat round as a top you can spin

And elastic to hold it on under my chin 

And brand-new shoes whiter than newly-poured cream

With heart-shaped, golden buckles that gleam; 

And I’ll carry a small purse of butterfly blue

With a penny for me and a penny for you

To buy us both glasses of cold lemonade

When we walk, hand in hand, in the Easter Parade."

By William Jay Smith

I witnessed a unique parade at Kimball Elementary School in Seattle last Friday, the day before Spring Break officially started. Timing-wise it could have been an Easter parade, but in actuality it was a Small, Small World Parade. I was subbing in a second grade classroom that afternoon and we were busy learning about all sorts of eggs (robin, emu, dinosaur, etc) and creating an egg book I found on Enchanted Learning. I even showed the children how to blow eggs which could be kept forever. In the midst of the activity, parade music blared over the loudspeaker and the children jumped up screaming "Parade

They rushed to the back of the class which was open to all of the other 2nd grade classes and lined up along one side, with ill concealed anticipation. We were about to witness an international spectacle, part of the Story Path social studies curriculum which Kimball first graders had made their own.

With joyful music as its precursor, over seventy first graders appeared from around a corner, processing, one after the other throughout the school, in time to the music. The second graders were thrilled as they shouted encouragement , no doubt also reliving their own first grade experience the year before.

In preparation for this big day, students from all three first grade rooms had paired up to learn about the country of their choice. On parade day, one student carried a colorful banner representing the chosen country while his/her partner carried an ethnic "float", a small cardboard box decorated with items pertaining to that country . Many children were dressed in ethnic garb, creating a visual delight which surely would long be remembered. On and on they came, proudly carrying the fruits of their labor. More than thirty countries were represented this day, and I was amazed at the amount of prior classroom learning that must have taken place for this event.

Since it was so close to Easter I couldn't help but make a comparison to our country's first Easter Parade in New York City in the mid 1800s. That annual secular parade was a way for the exclusively white upper crust of the time to show off their new outfits and hats. Later, in 1948, a popular movie entitled Easter Parade, starring Fred Astaire and Judy Garland, was released, and Irving Berlin's song about the parade became an instant hit. To this day most people know the first line - In your Easter bonnet, with all the frills upon it, you'll be the grandest lady in the Easter parade. In my opinion it was divisive. Those that "belonged" and those that didn't. The "haves" and the "have nots". Naturally as our country has evolved so has that traditional parade. Now, according to Newstimes.com hundreds of people from around the world gather to show off their holiday finery, including some that are zany and outlandish. According to the article it is now "really a leisurely stroll up and down Fifth Avenue between 49th and 57th street. It starts in the morning and continues into the late afternoon. . . This year's parade also features activists from the gay community. Two different groups plan to meet in front of St. Patrick's Cathedral to honor those who lost their lives because of prejudice."

We keep hearing about how dismal our educational ranking is with the rest of the world, but what I saw last Friday displayed the best of what America has to offer. We are teaching our children to care and value those of different ethnicities. To be inclusive rather than exclusive. In a shrinking world, this value is one of our strengths. Like another old popular song proclaims, 'It's a small world after all."

Happy Easter to ALL Americans, regardless of their roots, cultural, social or financial status.

AN "A" IS AN "A" BUT A "C" IS OK, RIGHT?

2011-04-17T20:44:00.000-07:00

"Life is an error-making and an error-correcting process, and nature in marking man's papers will grade him for wisdom as measured both by survival and by the quality of life of those who survive." Jonas Salk

Week #2: Our first Spanish test was Friday, on the conjugation of verbs ending in "ar". Other endings (i.e. verbs ending in ir or er) will be taught in the future. I'm pretty good at conjugating English verbs, so it shouldn't be a big leap to doing so in Spanish, right? Wrong! Here is an example:

In English, the infinitive (the word before conjugation) is to draw.

Singular: I draw, you draw, he/she/it draws Plural: we draw, you draw, they draw

In Spanish, the infinitive for draw is dibujar.

Singular: yo (I) dibujo, tu (accent on the tu) dibujas, el/ella/usted dibuja Plural: nosotros dibujamos, ustedes/ellos/ellas dibujan

On Thursday we were given twenty-four "ar ending" verbs in Spanish to memorize and conjugate in a quiz the next day. (groan). The groan became mental paralysis as I went over and over the verbs, finally commiting them to memory one minute, only to lose them the next. Was I falling victim to Alzheimer's, I fretted? I made flash cards, carrying them with me to the bathroom, in the car, to dinner and to bed, hoping the verbs would all sink in and stay there. Needless to say, my "A ethic" caused me to have a sleepless night.

The next morning I left early enough to find a nearby parking place, dashed in to a second-floor study room, and poured over the words yet again. Once in the classroom, after taking attendance, El Profesor put five words on the board, telling us to give both the meaning and conjugation of the words in the present tense. The verbs were draw, teach, watch, pay for and practice. Phew! I knew them all. He apparently said to use half a paper. I heard the half part, but didn't realize we were literally supposed to tear the paper in half. It was to be done within a timed period.

I finished proudly, ready to hand in my paper when, to my alarm, El Profesor wouldn't accept it because it wasn't on a half sheet of paper. Since my work went below the halfway line I couldn't just tear off half, I had to re-do the work, cramming it in as well as I could, with no chance to proofread what I had written before he said to stop writing.

He went on to teach about telling time (Que (accent mark) hora es), and while we dutifully worked with partners on a couple of exercises he was grading the quizzes. He passed out the corrected quizzes at the end of the period and I was horrified to discover a score of 7 out of 10 right answers. Definitely not an A grade! In my haste , on the word practicar, I had changed the c to g for some reason. Wrong! On ensenar, I left off something called a tilde which is a funny looking symbol above an n and which affects pronunciation. Wrong! On first person plural I put dibujamas instead of dibujamos. Wrong! Haste definitely made waste as the old saying goes, but such is the life of a student under pressure.

Lesson to be learned: Listen VERY carefully and follow every teacher direction. One poor soul had neglected to put his or her name on the paper. El Profesor crumpled the offending paper and threw it in the garbage can, while we students cringed at the thought it might have been us. That was definitely not going to be an "A" in the record book.

We filed out of the room at 9:20, some with broad smiles, and others looking shell shocked. After my original reaction I found humor in the whole situation, and have decided to frame my half sheet quiz as a reminder that A's aren't everything. By all accounts I must be the oldest student in the room. On the plus side I am not one of those senior citizens glued to the soaps on TV, or engaged in other relaxing activities. I'm keeping my brain busy, learning Spanish, and, hey! Maybe I can redeem myself on the next test and get that A after all. To help out, though, just in case, my husband ordered Rosetta Stone's Spanish lesson program. . . just in case. Chao

SCHOOL DAYS, SCHOOL DAZE

2011-04-10T18:30:00.000-07:00

It must be remembered that the purpose of education is not to fill the minds of students with facts…it is to teach them to think. ~ Robert M. Hutchins

April 4th found me circling the parking lot at Edmonds Community College in a vain attempt to find a space to park my car. For 15 minutes I drove around the campus, going ever further from my first class of the day - Spanish 100. Yup. I'm back in real college, taking ten credits towards renewing my teaching certificate.

Upon snagging a spot, panic set in when I realized how much time it would take me to walk across campus to my 8:30 a.m. class in Room 204 in Snoqualmie Hall. Being late is not my style, and certainly being late for my "first day" would not be cool. However, as I scurried along I found I was not alone. My fellow students were apparently doing the same, faces intent, coffees in hand.

I wasn't sure what to expect because it had been half a century since I was a freshman at the University of Washington, taking a full schedule of 100 level courses. Literally huffing and puffing I managed to arrive at the same time as the teacher, and slipped with relief into a second row seat. My first impression was how quiet everyone was. My second was seeing true diversity in age, race, and physical capability. In my first college experience all those years ago, the classes were filled with young, mostly white faces, and socializing, or should I say flirting, was a natural part of the educational process. After all, in those days girls were in college to get their "MRS." degrees. Right?

Here students ranged from 17 or l8 years of age to 60 +, with most in their 20s and 30s. One older fellow was getting a language requirement out of the way so that he could transfer to a special program at the U.W. Ditto a young mother trying to get into the nursing program at the same place.

The instructor was a brusque, no nonsense male in his fifties, who spoke in a heavily accented voice. Actually at the end of the period I decided he was pretty cool! After taking roll he spoke in a rapid fire mix of English and Spanish, and I was scribbling down notes as fast as I could, while also trying to understand what the heck he was saying.

In going over the syllabus he stressed the importance of classroom participation. Periodically he would ask a question requiring one of us to answer, but few were brave enough to try. Finally he asked a question I thought I could answer about the use of dipthongs in Spanish, but my answer did not meet with his approval. I think he said something like "on a scale of 1 to 5 with one being the lowest, my answer might be a 2". Since I have a 4.0 mentality this beginning salvo did not bode well for my future "A" grade.

At 9:20 the class ended and I dashed out the door to find my next class, beginning piano. It was located across the campus, and I was again out of breath when I arrived. Already I could see a benefit to my studies. Weightwatchers and my doctor have long been urging me to walk, and suddenly I am put in a situation where I must walk far and fast. Could it be that I will finally lose those pesky pounds?

The instructor, a warm, friendly woman probably also in her fifties, was flitting about making sure that each of the twenty-five or so students was sitting at a working keyboard. She was welcoming and outgoing, and I had the feeling that I just might be able to do o.k. in the piano playing department. The set up in the classroom was amazing. Each keyboard was hooked into some kind of electronic console at the front, and once we had all donned headphones, the teacher could talk to us as a group or individually if we pressed a button on our keyboards. She could also listen to us play solo the same way. This seemed like an efficient and effective way to teach the class.

A week has now passed and here are some major differences from fifty years ago, and insights gained.

First, despite all the media attention to the woes of higher education, EDCC seems to be doing a fine job of educating kids, from the point of registration to sitting in the classroom. I can now speak with some authority as I have "been there and done that!"

Fifty years ago I was a seventeen year old farm girl, excited to be away from home and living in a dormitory pretending to be all grown up. Dorm life was different from sorority life (less social but still fun), meeting other girls who would become lifelong friends. Much time was spent conjecturing and giggling over the attentions of this boy or that. I was not looking for an MRS. Degree, but still it was fun to dream. The girls lived on one side of the campus, the boys on the other, and the thought of panty raids was deliciously exciting. Curfew was 11:00 on weeknights and 2:00 on Friday and Saturday.

Now I am a senior citizen, mother and grandmother, with a specific purpose - certificate renewal. There must surely be giggling, hopeful girls somewhere on the EDCC campus or in class, but somehow the kids seem more focused and mature than I felt at the same age. Perhaps that is the nature of a community college with the vast majority being commuters, rather than at four-year schools where many live on campus, in a protected, youth-oriented environment.

Fifty years ago, the student body was largely white, as were members of the basketball and football teams. There was a "foreign student" presence, but those students were in the minority. The age range seemed to be 17-22. If one was handicapped the facilities were limited. A senior citizen student was rare indeed.

Now at community colleges and the University of Washington, one sees large numbers of international students chattering away in a multitude of languages. The teaching staff is equally diverse. Facilities allow for even seriously handicapped students to feel comfortable. Sport teams are full of minority students.

Fifty years ago I remember going to a gigantic building on the UW campus where registration took place. Everything seemed big - the majestic library, the buildings surrounding the Quad, Frosh Pond, the long walks between dorm and classes, especially science, historic Denny Hall and, of course, the HUB or student union building where we met up with friends. It was hard to find one's way around. To this day I find the immense campus confusing.

Now, at EDCC, I find buildings that are well marked , strategically placed direction markers in various pedestrian areas, and, when all else fails, maps to show where everything is located. Walking across campus is doable. The buildings are attractive and serviceable. They do the intended job.

Fifty years ago a few lucky young people, mostly guys, had cars. Most did not. We walked around campus and down to the "Ave" where we shopped, saw a movie, or ate out occasionally. Rarely did we go downtown, but if so, we took busses. There were few parking areas, and parking was not a problem.

Now it seems like most college students have wheels, although there are many who also take the bus. This means that large areas of campus must having parking for staff and students alike. I think EDCC has a leg up compared to other colleges. I didn't have to pay for parking, I simply have to get there early enough to find a space. This was problematic the first week, and I found I needed to come earlier and earlier to snag a spot.

Fifty years ago cost of tuition at the University of Washington was listed at $25.00 per quarter for residents, with 15 + credits a full load. That would be $75.00 per year. Is that even possible? EDCC did not exist at that time. The cost was within the budget of most kids if they worked, and the post-college debt load was insignificant unless you were in medical school.

Now The annual tuition is $8,701 for residents at the UW. At EDCC the present day cost for a full load (ten or more credits) is $870.00 per quarter or approximately $2700.00 per year. The debt load for loans and other money acquisitions, despite healthy scholarships and grants, is huge and hard to pay back.

And the biggest change . . . Technology!

Fifty years ago I lugged my old manual Underwood typewriter to college and used it for term papers and letters home. Some papers were handwritten. One prayed for no mistakes because corrections were messy and there was no such thing as liquid paper. When an easy-erase paper arrived on the scene we rejoiced. Based on today's standards and output of information, I honestly don't know how we survived.

Now we register on line, talk to the professors on line, use an on-line resource called Blackboard, that I don't yet fully understand, and in general have student academic lives dictated by the internet. As an aside, referring to the importance of the internet in our daily lives, during my first week of school our home phones and internet connections went ka-put and we were lost until a repairman arrived.

So what is the lesson to be learned? Every generation has its good points and bad, its problems and solutions.

Fifty years ago I loved living on campus, socializing and making lifelong friends. It helped to shape who I am and what my contributions to the world are. Part of me is sorry that many of today's young people cannot have that experience. It kept us young and blissfully ignorant about life's problems for a few extra years.

But now, in this age of technology, young people grow up faster and are more informed. Ignorance is not possible. Therefore, I am pleased to see the seriousness and apparent dedication of the present day students, at least at the community college level. They are dealing with the hand life has dealt them, and are eager to make their own marks on the world. Sadly they will have other problems to deal with such as our economy, world-wide unrest, environmental issues and the like. Somehow I hope and believe today's young people will rise to the occasion.

DREAMS ARE MADE OF THIS!

2011-04-03T11:17:00.000-07:00

"Every good act is charity. A man's true wealth hereafter is the good that he does in this world to his fellows." Moliere

April 15. . . We all recognize that date if we have made money during the year. The IRS stands by to take its fair or unfair share of that, depending on one's point of view. Many have already faced the music and filed. Millions of others wait until the last possible moment to put their returns in the mailbox. If you are one of the latter, and need a tax write-off of some kind, consider this. Charitable donations are the life blood of many community organizations, foundations and churches. Your contributions are tax deductible and can make it possible for many worthwhile groups to continue their good work.

We, for example, support Edmonds Community College, United Way, the American Diabetes Association, Cocoon House, the Seattle Symphony, the Multiple Sclerosis Foundation, and several others. Our favorite foundation is our own, the Martin Luther King School Dream Foundation. May I suggest that you put it on your list of future giving? You would be making it possible for many Seattle area young people to have a chance at getting a higher education, whether it is the local beauty school, a community college or the most prestigious four year university in the country.

A banquet honoring this year's crop of winners and their families will take place on Monday, May 23 at the Mount Zion Baptist Church. They will join the ranks of over one hundred former winners, most of whom are leading busy, productive lives, and some of whom have reached a certain level of celebrity.

We all know that Martin Luther King, Jr. had a dream. Through his vision and dedication he and millions of others began a civil rights movement to eliminate racism, paving the way for the first African-American president to be elected. I think most people have dreams, no matter how simple. Some realize them while others look back wistfully at the "if onlys" in life.

The Dream Foundation makes it possible for some disadvantaged young people in Seattle to take that important first step to a productive future. Since 1999 over one hundred scholarships have been given. Many have graduated from or are attending well known universities such as the University of Washington, Clark Atlanta, NYU, USC, and more. Others have attended various Washington state community colleges and technical schools. Some have enrolled in certificate programs, getting good jobs upon graduating.

My husband and I started this foundation after an unexpected financial windfall. For seventeen years our dedicated board has provided stewardship of our funds and added its own. Others have chipped in as well. Perhaps you would like to add your financial assistance to help young people in the Seattle area achieve their dreams. Go to www.mlkdream.com and check out how we started and what we are all about. Click the "donate button" to provide a donation that will insure anything from a book or student fee to a year of college. Such a donation allows you to help someone achieve a dream, and it's a great feeling! Not only that, it's tax deductible, and you'll get another good feeling come tax time.

Beyond that, what matters to me is to make a difference in someone's life, to help them realize their dreams, and to throw a financial stone that ripples out into the future. Edwin Hubbel Chapin says it well. "Every action in our lives touches on some chord that will vibrate in eternity." Click on http://www.mlkdream.com/ and throw out your own stone. It WILL make a difference.

A LETTER TO THE PRESIDENT OF THE USA

2011-03-27T23:39:00.000-07:00

Leaders establish the vision for the future and set the strategy for getting there; they cause change. They motivate and inspire others to go in the right direction and they, along with everyone else, sacrifice to get there. Author Unknown

Dear President Obama,

I think I just stumbled upon the school the rest of the country is looking for -- Thornton Creek Elementary School in Seattle, an alternative public school. Last week I was called to substitute in a kindergarten class there, and I was blown away by what I observed and learned by talking to teachers and parents there. There are many fine schools in Seattle, but I believe this one is exemplary. Why?

The school brochure, complete and slickly designed, refers to the Thornton Creek difference. Academic rigor based on exploration and discovery is key. Parental involvement is mandatory – 40 volunteer hours a year. Involvement can be anything from working in the classroom and serving on committees to chaperoning and helping to maintain school grounds.

Based on a model called Expeditionary Learning Outward Bound (ELOB), ten principles are built into the program:

Primacy of self discovery
The having of wonderful ideas
The responsibility for learning
Empathy and caring
Success and failure
Collaboration and competition
Diversity and inclusion
The natural world
Solitude and reflection
Service and compassion

I get excited simply by looking at the principles and imagining what they mean for the children attending this school. Each class decides what the expeditionary learning will be for the year and the students are immersed in that learning.

Looping is the form of instruction used. This allows a teacher to remain with her students for at least two years, then returning for a new group of children. When a child is in a looping classroom it means that he or she misses out on a possible teacher for the second year. I asked one parent if this was seen as a problem because of the potential of having a less skilled teacher for two years. She told me that there were only good teachers at Thornton Creek and she was comfortable with whomever her son had.

The first six weeks are spent “setting expectations and building community” which encompasses rules for behavior, school goals and a foundation for a productive year.

The mission is for “staff administration and families to work cooperatively to meet the diverse needs of the students.” These include addressing all needs of the child, supporting experiential learning, promoting involvement by the parents and community, and extending learning to the world beyond.

So why aren’t all schools in Seattle built on this model, with the potential of educational excellence for all? I guess, as usual, it boils down to lack of funding and parental involvement.

This school started in l974 with parents who wanted a “private school” education in a public school setting and were willing to fund it. There were 125 students and four teachers. Now there are 325 students enrolled with a large waiting list for many others.

One sad commentary: It is troubling that there is little diversity in the sea of student faces, but I was told by one of the instructors at the school that this program can work anywhere, even in the less advantaged areas, if resources were committed to implementing ELOB. How might this be possible? Since parent involvement is a major part of the success, and since that's missing in many underserved schools, could TFA and Americorps teachers take the place of parents? Is there some other way of filling in the parent involvement piece where it is so deeply needed? Are there groups of volunteers that would dedicate themselves to fundraising such as auctions, like that which takes place at Thornton Creek?

I respectfully bring this school to your attention and that of the Secretary of Education, with the hope that someone in a position of authority will determine how we could use this educational format for our schools in crisis.

Sincerely,

Jan Lind-Sherman

A Seattle Public School Substitute Teacher

EDUCATIONAL EXCELLENCE IN SEATTLE DOES EXIST!

2011-03-20T17:39:00.000-07:00

"Many things can wait. Children cannot. Today their bones are being formed, their blood is being made, their senses are being developed. To them we cannot say "tomorrow." Their name is today."
– Gabriela Mistral (Chilean teacher 1899 - 1957)

After retiring in 2006 I turned my hand to subbing, first all day, and now half days in the afternoon. This so that I could spend mornings writing a blog, poetry and children's stories. The latter remains a publishing dream. To date, counting those which have since closed, I have been in about fifty elementary and K-8 schools. This experience has afforded me a firsthand look at what is going on for elementary age public school kids. My opinion: The news is mostly good.
A snapshot of Maple and Olympic Hills Elementary Schools follows:

Last week I saw an example of excellent team teaching in the third grade at Maple Elementary , a warm, welcoming school located on Beacon Hill in Seattle. It features an open concept setting which means that the three classrooms are separated only by partial partitions, with the back part of the room devoted to computers and round tables for smaller groups. The learning area is called a pod and this was the D pod - D1, D2, and D3. By peering around the partitions one can catch a glimpse of what is going on in the other rooms. The noise level is surprisingly manageable.

What I liked: The three teachers rotated every 45 minutes from one third grade to another, each teaching to their areas of interest and expertise. I took the place of a teacher who was teaching writing. The other two teachers were experts in math and science. I remembered the teacher who was responsible for science as the district coach for that subject years ago when I was at Martin Luther King Elementary School. She was an outstanding coach then, and seemed equally skilled in her present post. I liked going from one learning area to another rather than having the children move. As I taught the same lesson for all three I felt confident that I was following the day's objective and that I was not just "baby sitting" as a substitute.

What I didn't like: The teachers are under such stress to get their scores up they are worried they might have to give up a teaching format they all seem to like. These days If the overall scores aren't high enough the teacher risks losing his or her job. The burden is on each individual teacher to have high enough scores. In team teaching each teacher has to have trust that his or her teammates are doing their jobs. Never mind that the playing field is not level for schools like Maple, with a high level of students on free and reduced lunches and homes where English is not the first language. In my view, teachers using best practices, and working together to provide an excellent education, should not have the constant threat of test scores driving their programs.

Two days later found me at Olympic Hills in Lake City. My first impression was of a front office staff that, like Maple, was also warm and welcoming. As I went down the hall to a second grade traditional classroom my next impression was the face of true diversity. The staff was wide ranging in age and race, and one teacher was conducting class from a wheel chair. I later learned that the student population represented thirty different countries and eighteen different languages.

Before the teacher in my assigned room left, she shared some information that I found interesting. One new student was from Eretria in Northern Africa. He spoke little English and was unused to classroom rules. Luckily another student, whose parents came from that country, spoke the language and was able to communicate with the newcomer. I was also told that, contrary to what occurs in most schools, I would not have to go out and get the children as they lined up from their lunch recess. They would come in on their own. This they did, quietly taking their seats and waiting respectfully for me to speak. Perhaps my biggest surprise was the class size - 15 students in all. This is indeed a blessing in today's world of shrinking dollars causing growing classrooms.

In my experience this is unique. For students to line up and come to their classrooms can often be a trying experience. When the bell rings for entering the building, usually the teacher meets the students and escorts them to their lockers or rooms. Recess behavior usually comes in with the children, ranging from complaining about a playground problem to tattling about someone "taking cuts" and running ahead. To minimize this all kinds of ploys are used. "Lip-Hip" means putting a finger on one's mouth with one hand while the other hand is touching one's hip. Hugging oneself to keep from touching a student in front or behind is another. None of that was necessary.

Many schools have a self-manager program, where those students who show they can manage their own behavior get special perks, i.e. going to lunch or out to recess on their own, an extra recess for all self managers at the end of the week, etc. Unfortunately, as good as it sounds, it isn't always as effective as it could be in many buildings. At this school they have a successful Self-Manager program in place. Their school-wide expectation is that students be kind, helpful, safe and responsible. They indeed walk the talk, and it's a refreshing change.

In speaking with the principal at the end of the day I learned that Olympic Hills has several programs providing academic rigor. Five staff members were trained in the Lucy Calkins model of teaching reading and writing. She said O.H. is called a "lab school" where colleagues from other schools, twenty so far, come to observe good teaching techniques. All teachers provide readers' and writers' workshops, and an overall curriculum plan for the school is followed. She was particularly proud of the fact that community money makes it possible to provide free musical instruments for 4th and 5th graders to have music one day a week.

I understand this wonderful program may be at risk in the future because of funding woes. If so, what a shame! Perhaps the public relations department in Seattle Public Schools should feature
how schools are benefiting by community money, and what will be lost without their continued support. Individuals won't help fund what they aren't aware of.

The computer lab is manned by a former 4th and 5th grade teacher who helps students to become computer literate, and gives a strong focus to the academic program. Parents and students can log on to the computer and see homework assignments, academic activities for reading, writing, math and English language learners, games and more. Check the Olympic Hills site, and go to the computer teacher's classroom page to see the many activities available.

In asking about the small class size she explained that they chose to spend their money in a way that would allow for the smaller numbers, which meant that they had to give up on other things. As an example, teachers needed to incorporate art into their own classroom lessons rather than having an art teacher. She pointed out that their success comes despite 71% of the students being on free or reduced lunches, 30% of the student body being bi-lingual, and 18% designated as special education students.

It is my understanding that this is a certified Advanced Learning Opportunity School which means that daily classroom learning contain educational experiences above the children's grade level. This seems to be reflected in the school district data. I checked out the stats for this school on the Seattle Public Schools web site, and was not surprised to see their positive results. See for yourself by going to http://district.seattleschools.org/, then clicking on "schools" which will take you to this school or any other school in which you are interested.

With all the bad news in Seattle, l'd like to give my own personal "shout out" to Maple and Olympic Hills. You are doing right by your students, the families, and the community. You represent what educator Deborah Meier envisioned when she said "Good schools, like good societies and good families, celebrate and cherish diversity." You are doing what you can to make sure your students are reaching their potential.

SHAKE UP IN JAPAN!

2011-03-13T11:36:00.000-07:00

The strength of a nation derives from the integrity of the home. Confucious

Note: Check out this special site for children called Earthquakes for Kids.

Nearly twenty five years ago my husband and I honeymooned in Japan. I was struck by several things:

Streets in Tokyo were packed with smallish people scurrying purposefully around the city. Pint sized vehicles, especially delivery and other trucks, reflecting the lack of space, jammed the streets. Underground one found a network of subways and what amounted to another city filled with stores and restaurants. The bullet train moved people across the country at 300 km per hour. Mount Fuji's majestic beauty seemed to float in the distance. The population was both friendly and welcoming. Schools were huge and filled with large classes of well-behaved children focused on their learning. These same children took responsibility for taking care of and cleaning their learning environment. People practiced moderation in their food portions, and there was little sign of obesity. And most impressive of all, one experienced a general attitude of respect for others.

The latter was evidenced when I accidentally left my purse on a bench in a busy part of the city, only to find it in that same spot later that day. When discussing this experience with some Japanese acquaintances I learned such honesty was a rule rather than an exception. I was amazed at this level of honesty which often seems missing in large urban areas of the U.S. , indeed in much of the rest of the world.

Now we are watching in horrified disbelief as the entire population of a very small country deals with the devastation of a 9.0 earthquake and a following Tsunami, terrible in scope and damage. The destruction and cost defies understanding, but a couple of things stand out.

The Japanese people are still respectful and purposeful. Yes, they might be used to earthquakes, and the resulting fallout, but nothing prepared them for "the big one" last week. How they are dealing with this tragedy should be a lesson for all of us.

We see no signs of looting or violence, and we see people, whose hearts must be breaking, pitching in to help each other, even to the point of sharing their precious water. This level of respect should give us all pause, since we in America have come to expect both looting AND violence in our own catastrophes - witness what happened in Katrina.

The question is, " Why there and not here?" We have long heard about the tight-knit families in Japan, their respect for elders, and their emphasis on education and personal responsibility. Does it break down to family values then?

An article from Country Studies, states that the Japanese people value harmony, order and self development, and believe that anti-social behavior will doom society. Children are taught from an early age about their society's interdependence, first in the family and later in the society at large. Group harmony is especially important.

The influence of Confucianism on social order is strong. From the essay "Da Xue" (The Great Learning), comes this statement: "Their persons being cultivated, their families were regulated. Their families being regulated, their states were rightly governed. They states being rightly governed, the whole kingdom was made tranquil and happy."

Because the country's population is both small and homogenous, control over social order is easier to exert and maintain than in a country like ours that allows for greater inclusion of other cultures. It would be difficult to fully discuss here the cultural differences that cause the Japanese to be so respectful to others while many of us seem to have such a profound lack of that trait.

To me, this is the defining difference. Japanese society is homogenous, and children learn their values from the cradle. The United States is an ever-changing population of people from all over the world who bring their own belief systems with them, some of them violent. Add poverty, access to guns, little media censorship, and a feeling of entitlement by many, and you have a recipe for disrespectful behavior.

Here are two scenarios that might be illuminating. In Seattle, if I have a class of learners from homes where respect is the norm and education is valued, the children are respectful and open to learning. If a new student comes into the class who acts out and is prone to disrespect, that student is absorbed into the class which, as a group, forces the "lone student" to conform to the class norms.

On the other hand, if I have a class of students, many of whom are disrespectful and act out, those students who have been taught to be respectful at home will often cave in and either add to the chaos or become passive. After all, it sometimes feels like more fun to be naughty than nice.

It's my belief that we probably can't be like the people in Japan overall in terms of respect. We can only try to influence our unruly citizens to see that being respectful and law-abiding is more advantageous in the long run.

Luckily for Japan their citizens are honest, hardworking, ambitious, well educated, and understand the importance of working in groups, They will need all of those traits and skills to survive the coming days, months and years ahead. They did it in the past after WWII. I think they can do it again. In the meantime we, as Americans, should learn a lesson from our Pacific Rim neighbors by modeling honesty and integrity in our daily lives. Good luck and God bless to Japan and its people!